• Be. Are. See.

    Whew, I was worried I’d have to try to remember to switch threads when Smackdown was on.

  • Grampa Mongolian Stomper X

    Rubbish!

    • Grampa Mongolian Stomper X

      What do you think of it so far?

  • Bonzai <3 Felicity S&Moak

    Mazzy Star’s “Fade Into You” popping up on my Pandora station. Always makes think of the sweet scene in “Angus” where the fat kid dances with Lex the prom queen.

  • PrideOfCanada

    Sportsnet’s WWE Aftermath host: “I know Renee. She’s into weird things.”

    Wat.

    • Bonzai <3 Felicity S&Moak

      Like, butt stuff?

    • Grampa Mongolian Stomper X

      I mean, she’s with Ambrose. Sounds legit.

  • Bruce Chung

    Bulls have an 11 point lead in the 2nd quarter, even without 2011 NBA MVP Derrick Rose.

    • Grampa Mongolian Stomper X

  • Aaron
    • Bonzai <3 Felicity S&Moak

      BANG! FROM DOWNTOWN!

  • Be. Are. See.

    Old Jamie Lee Curtis is just troubling to me for some reason.

    • JosephM

      The woman isn’t afraid to let her hair be natural silver/grey- good for her.

  • SpiralTap

    I’m here for the A-show.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Yep.

  • WWF1987

    The Nintendo Switch is going to be $250. Awesome price.

    • SodaPop

      It’s official?

      • Bonzai <3 Felicity S&Moak

        Not until Friday’s presentation, both US and UK retail sources have it on good authority that’s the price it’ll be.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      :nods head:
      not bad.

    • Bonzai <3 Felicity S&Moak

      They better be enough of them on shelves.

      • Edward M

        Its Nintendo, they won’t.

    • Grampa Mongolian Stomper X

      So what’s this gonna be, some video game?

    • BretHart1987

      I usually do not buy Nintendo systems, but this might be must.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      That’s such a great price, it’s making me worry about the quality of its library.

    • Jackson Smith

      What’s the Switch?

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Time for the real A show.

  • Bonzai <3 Felicity S&Moak
  • SpiralTap

    I love that Dean/Renee is canon.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Same.

  • Grampa Mongolian Stomper X

    Fuck it, I laughed.

    • Bonzai <3 Felicity S&Moak

      ….

      • Grampa Mongolian Stomper X

        Sorry there weren’t enough naked women to hold your attention, pal!

  • Bruce Chung

    Maryse’s slap is a shoot.

  • johntcole

    Bobby Fish has replaced Kyle O’Reilly for Saturday’s ROH TV tapings I’m going to. Allegedly some very messy backstage shit happened that involved ROH trying to stop Kyle from leaving.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Bah, Disqus is acting up again. 🙁

  • SodaPop

    Someone wake me up on Rumble night. Even if not, whatever.

    Ray of fucking sunshine tonight.

  • Brooks

    Deans “all clear” still gets a laugh from me

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Of course Disqus acts up during the good show.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Ugh.

  • Jackson Smith

    Stupid Disqus!

    • JosephM

      And this is from 29 minutes ago, and just showed up as new! Stupid Disqus!

  • Bonzai <3 Felicity S&Moak

    LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO

    Inaugural planner Tom Barrack told pool reporters Tuesday that unlike Obama’s star-studded inauguration, Trump’s event won’t feature any celebrities because Trump is “the greatest celebrity in the world.” He also promised a “soft sensuality,” and a “poetic cadence,” the first and last time those words will arise in conjunction with Donald Trump.

    “What we’ve done instead of trying to surround him with what people consider A-listers is we are going to surround him with the soft sensuality of the place. It’s a much more poetic cadence than having a circus-like celebration that’s a coronation,” Barrack said. “That’s the way this president-elect wanted it. I think it will be contributive. It will be beautiful. The cadence of it is going to be ‘let me get back to work.’”

    • Jackson Smith

      R. Kelly will definitely sing now

      • Bonzai <3 Felicity S&Moak

        Man, how he gon make a video about peeing on somebody?

  • Aaron

    It’s not the same without Mitch.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    “The first Smackdown guy to enter the Rumble…”
    But….Corbin…

    • SpiralTap

      Corbin isn’t a guy, he’s a vampire.

    • Bruce Chung

      Not after the inCenarator.

  • SpiralTap

    Disqus needs to deepthroat my balls.

    • Bonzai <3 Felicity S&Moak

      Watch it, PK won’t stand for that kind of queerin round these parts

    • Fester

      This just popped up as a new post in my feed. You’re not wrong.

  • Be. Are. See.

    “I named him Maurice.” Fuck off, Ambrose.

  • Bruce Chung

    Maryse looks great as usual.

  • Brooks

    Hello Maryse.

  • Ripner Cabbit

    So my new plan for tackling Raw and SD each week. Set a torrent of Raw to download before I leave for work Tue morning, watch Raw as I do after work chores (Tue is laundry day plus always have some dishes and bills and such to take care of), finish chores and Raw and then watch Smackdown Live and Talkin Smack.

  • Biff ♥ You

    I did something tonight I haven’t done in over a decade: rushed home to watch wrestling.

    SmackDown AGOGO babee

  • JosephM

    Yay, Smackdown- The good show, it only annoys me 38.2% of the time!

  • Jackson Smith

    They’ve really gotta stop reminding people the belt stunk for so long, lol, it’s not helping anyone.

  • johntcole

    Adam Cole and Kyle O’Reilly teaming back up as asshole heels in NXT would totally be my jam.

    • Ripner Cabbit

      “CAM DOLE BAY BEE”

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    So many interesting developments going into the Rumble match.

  • Jackson Smith

    Co-ERSED, Miz.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Why is Otunga allowed to talk weekly?

    • Bruce Chung

      Thanks Obama.

  • SpiralTap

    Is it necessary for SD guys to announce their entry into the Rumble?

    I mean, there’s only 15 guys on the roster.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      If I announce my candidacy for the BoD Rumble, I wonder if that means I’ll be in it.

      But then, I don’t think I can fast-track myself to the main roster like that. Gotta put my dues in down in Orlando.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      They only need 15.

      • SpiralTap

        DATS DA JOKE

    • Daniel O’Reilly

      Even Curt Hawkins is probably in it.

  • Jackson Smith

    Do it for your country? LOL

  • Aaron

    Miz acts like how poor people think rich, famous people act. It’s great.

    • Jackson Smith

      He enjoys golden showers with Russian hookers?

      • Aaron

        I said how poor people *think* rich people act, not how they really act.

      • Bruce Chung

    • Brian_Bayless

      Miz pulls off his role to perfection.

    • Grampa Mongolian Stomper X

      You mean they don’t?!?

      • Aaron

        You’re right; Miz doesn’t have a captain’s hat.

  • A Wrestling god

    Wrestlemania back in New Orleans, already? Are they going to be like the NFL and College Football and start holding the event there regularly to benefit the city?

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Continuity!

  • Thebraziliankid

    When I was racking wins on fightcade the whole thing crashes, FACK them.

  • SpiralTap

    BAM, continuity.

    LOVE IT.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    “You tried”

  • Jackson Smith

    A participation award for Miz, haha

  • Jackson Smith

    Just a straight YOU SUCK chant, that’s nice. Smackdown’s great.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      But, he deserves it!

    • JosephM

      Even the crowd keeps it simple.

  • Bruce Chung

    lol the thumbs up to Maryse.

    • Jackson Smith

      Delightful

  • Be. Are. See.

    I get why Ambrose is the babyface here, at least. I still don’t like him, though.

  • Brooks

    I’m assuming they are pushing out the Renee bitch smack of Maryse to the rumble. Smart.

  • Aaron

    I like that they’re not rushing Renee into this.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Making this show feel like another mini PPV.

    • Fester

      Smackdown is great!

  • Bruce Chung

    Nikki vs. Nattie is perfectly acceptable. But it’d be something if Cena dumped Nikki for Nattie.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      If Nikki were dating a midcarder, that’s exactly where this angle would be headed.

    • SpiralTap

      Need T-Kidd to get with Nikki, since both their necks are fucked.

  • SodaPop

    Brock Lesnar accidentally walked on the Jets logo in the locker room. Luckily Brock Lesnar does what the fuck he wants.

    • Bonzai <3 Felicity S&Moak

      “I DON’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOUR LOGO”

  • Bruce Chung

    Nikki’s Bella Twins are set to HUGE tonight.

    • Bonzai <3 Felicity S&Moak

      Silicone parts are made for toys. Brie, please.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Natalia was in the farting position.

  • Fester

    Just turned into Smackdown.

    That bitch got jumped!

  • Grampa Mongolian Stomper X

    Same damn spot with the garage door. How about some variety?

  • Jackson Smith

    75% of Nikki’s on-camera output for the last year has been getting thrown into a grate backstage.

    • SpiralTap

      Only 25% more and it’ll be where it needs to be.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Now we’ve graduated to adding old posts to the top! Progress, Disqus!

    • SpiralTap

      Love my e-Delorean.

  • Kenny_Reigns

    Hey everybody! You can vote on the new Monopoly pieces! One of them is a dinosaur!!

    http://www.votemonopoly.com/?locale=en-us

  • Daniel O’Reilly

    Man. Just when everyone was good and distracted by Nikki’s shorts, Natalya’s has to ruin it.

    • Be. Are. See.

      Her rubbing her thigh seductively while ‘selling’ worked out okay, though, I guess.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Domino’s trying to get my business by using my favorite 80s song.

    • JosephM

      Hardee’s trying to get my attention with greasy, unhealthy cheap food.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Sadly, I have some bad news everyone. Cagematch added the match where Cena beat AJ in that rumored dark match a week before Ellsworth beat Styles to their website. This means that Ellsworth never held the title for 70 days, Cena has heard it for 98 days, and now he’s the 4th longest reigning champ in combined reigns because of it.
    Continue on hating Cena because of this, and root for Corbin to win big tonight.

    • Fester

      I didn’t need more reason to cheer for Corbin!

    • SpiralTap

      Someone ban this doofus.

  • Fester

    Guys, Smackdown’s really not that different from Raw. You can make a lot of comparisons between Daniel Bryan and Mick Foley, Kevin Owens and AJ Styles, Roman Reigns and Dean Ambrose…

    /rips bong

  • Bruce Chung

    Nattie’s cat is more over than Nattie.

  • LScisco

    LOL “Nikki Bella is the #1 diva in the world!”

  • Be. Are. See.

    Uhh, nobody thinks that John. And no twirl, fuck off.

  • Bruce Chung

    lol, no Bella twirl.

    • Fester

      Dammit this show’s off to a bad start!

  • Fester

    No Bella twirl? IDK if I’m feeling this Smackdown.

    • Be. Are. See.

      I’d assume we’d bitch if she stopped to twirl when she’s supposed to be selling and being angry, though, too.

      • Fester

        truth

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    I’m ok with this brawl.

  • JosephM

    Nikki showing fire, good for her. This is how a feud like this should go.

  • Brian_Bayless
  • LScisco

    At least Nikki ditched those UFC gloves.

  • Bruce Chung

    Nikki’s shorts are too large.

    • Be. Are. See.

      At least she’s not wearing the black ones again. I was concerned that they were so tight that she couldn’t get them off.

  • JosephM

    Now why do they need to throw this match out, makes no sense, they’re in the ring, call for the bell and just start it.

    • Jackson Smith

      DEMERIT, Ryan Ward

    • Brandon Robles

      Makes perFect sense. Both competitors have to be standing beFore the oFFicial can ask the time keeper to ring the bell.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    “Let them fight!” chant for Nikki and Nattie!
    Only on Smackdown!

  • Biff ♥ You

    LOL, Lil’ Naitch copping a feel on Nikki there.

  • maskedcabana

    Lil Naitch getting a bit frisky with Nikki.

  • Bruce Chung

    I bet Bret gets angry every time Nattie fucks up the sharpshooter.

  • LScisco

    What an ugly Sharpshooter

  • Daniel O’Reilly

    Not a great looking sharpshooter.

  • chicagodem79

    Wow, that was an energetic little brawl there.

  • Jackson Smith

    Geez, Nattie, that was a Rock-level Sharpshooter

  • SpiralTap

    What kinda fucking segue was that?

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Things are really heating up, so let’s watch this clip!

  • Bruce Chung

    He’s here to throw a fit, he’s here to throw a fit.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    :pulls hair back:
    Please just fire this woman!

    • SpiralTap

      I’d pull her hair

    • Daniel O’Reilly

      They surely have better options.

  • Daniel O’Reilly

    The Robot has some pertinent things to say about tension and aggression.

  • LScisco

    Disqus is really being weird tonight. New comments are 18 minutes old

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Yeah, really strange.

  • Fester

    One of the “rumorz” sites said that when it comes to writing Raw, the writers need to write for Vince, Steph, and HHH’s approval. When writing for Smackdown, Ryan Ward just needs to please Vince.

    Are we sure it’s not HHH and Steph ruining WWE?

    • Ripner Cabbit

      I wouldn’t be surprised if Steph is the problem then. Pretty sure when he wrote NXT he just had to please HHH.

  • Be. Are. See.

    “I don’t owe you people an explanation!”

  • Bruce Chung

    He can’t cry! He can’t cry! No Golden Globes for him.

  • Edward M

    How is this secondary women’s feud on the secondary show more heated than KO vs Reigns, which is supposed to be over the most important title in WWE?

  • Biff ♥ You

    Dolph Ziggler beats up Kalisto for trying to help him, Kalisto gets pissed, demands a match.

    Episodic booking in 2017!

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Logical booking.

  • SpiralTap

    Crowd cheering because Dolph didn’t cut his usual “I BUST MY ASS EVERY NIGHT AND STEAL THE SHOW AND I GET NOTHING IN RETURN AND NOW THINGS ARE GONNA CHANGE” promo

    • Fester

      I miss that promo 🙁

      • Daniel O’Reilly

        It’s kind of overused at this point.

        • Fester

          Sorry my sarcasm was terrible there. That’s my bad.

  • JosephM

    Dolph needs to say “I’m tired of just stealing the show, now I’m taking the show all for me!”

  • Bones

    Who’s this woman they’ve had on interviews?

    She can’t talk…at all.

    • Daniel O’Reilly

      She’s a robot.

      • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

        She is the real prototype.

    • Be. Are. See.

      She’s quite pleasing to look at with the sound down, though, I suppose.

    • Mr.Snrub

      Dasha Fuentes i think or Charly Caruso.

      One or the other i’m not convinced they’re 2 different people yet.

      • Brooks

        It was dasha. Charly is cuter. Dasha is cute but more built.

    • Brooks

      Dasha

  • Grampa Mongolian Stomper X

    FOR BONZAI

  • Be. Are. See.

    So does Mark Wahlberg only do on screen adaptations of real life tragedies now?

    • Bruce Chung

      He also talks to alien robots.

    • JosephM

      And this time he’s not even playing a real person, but a ‘composite’.

    • Miko363

      He’s “honoring the victims” by booking himself to be a superhero and getting compensated for it.

      It’s the Hollywood version of John Cena cutting one of those “I support the troops so don’t you dare boo me!” pandering promos.

  • Jackson Smith

    Hey, does anyone know if Trump’s presser tomorrow is only on TV or is it streaming?

    HEYOOOOOOO

    • Biff ♥ You

      Ugh. People keep trying to make fetch happen. It ain’t happening.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Disqus making me reload to see replies.

    Is there a commenting system for blogs that isn’t an enormous shit sandwich?

    • Ripner Cabbit

      Its either this or having it through FaceBook

      • cabspaintedyellow

        Yeah, I’ll take Disqus every day and thrice on Sunday if that’s the alternative.

      • Kenny_Reigns

        Ewww! Yuck! I’ll take the crab juice!

    • Daniel O’Reilly

      I can’t think of one.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      I wish. When it works, Disqus is one of the best ones.

      • chicagodem79

        Especially for those who don’t want to use Facebook either.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Alicia Fuuuuuuuuuuux

    • Fester

      My favorite part of the cruiserweight division is Dar saying Fooooooooxxxxxxx

  • maskedcabana

    Foooooxxxx.

    • Fester

      Dar is the best cruiserweight

  • Be. Are. See.

    Yes, Otunga. Kalisto is so angry that he’s doing his shitty lucha dance thing.

  • Brian_Bayless
    • cabspaintedyellow

      He really shouldn’t rush it. I don’t see him getting a major match at Mania if he shows up three-four weeks before the show. And I’d rather have him return the night after Mania and begin building from there, than get lost in the Mania season shuffle.

  • Ripner Cabbit

    Dolph’s music seems so outdated.

    • Fester

      Really? For me it’s hit HBK levels. He’s stuck with it. I don’t even remember his old theme at this point.

      • JosephM

        I am Perfectiooooooon!

  • SpiralTap

    At least Kalisto went back to tights.

    That trunks look was SUPER twinky.

    • Fester

      It was terrible

  • Fester

    Daniel Bryan’s not at Smackdown again? Fuck!!!

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Kalisto is angry. He’s really doing a good Lucha thing right now.

    • JosephM

      Yaaaaaaaaaah!

  • cabspaintedyellow

    I literally forgot Kalisto was US Champion this time last year.

  • JosephM

    Ziggler needs a Jericho 08 makeover alongside this heel turn.

    • Edward M

      Jericho and Ziggler both started out emulating early 90s HBK. Jericho evolved, Ziggler never did.

    • Mr.Snrub

      He doesn’t have that level in him.

  • Aaron

    Dolph got distracted thinking about golden showers.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Hey, a new post showed up on top! Is it fixed?!?

    • Bones

      Nope, I hit refresh and saw a bunch more

  • johntcole
    • Jackson Smith

      Niiiiiiice

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Now Disqus is doing that thing where it loads comments from 12 minutes ago as new.

    • Ripner Cabbit

      Yea says this was posted 9 min ago

  • cabspaintedyellow

    “You take it like a man. You don’t go in the back and start beating people up.”

    Otunga is one more soundbite away from “You can’t fight in here! This is the War Room!”

  • Jackson Smith

    “Mauro compared Ziggler’s career to a toilet seat!”

    [Trump makes sure to call for WrestleMania tickets]

  • johntcole

    For fucks sake stop cheering Ziggler please

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      The fans just love his babyface selling.

    • Ripner Cabbit

      They did when he was fighting AJ

  • chicagodem79

    Let’s Go Ziggler/Lucha…Lucha

    Well that’s certainly a first lol.

  • Bruce Chung

    “His own mind is playing mind games with himself.” – Otunga.

    • AnInternetToughGuy

      Glorious

  • Be. Are. See.

    Ziggler turns heel and JBL suddenly likes him? Fuck off.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      To be fair, the Brain used to act like this all the time. It adds to his heel persona, in that it makes him a giant hypocrite by having his opinion on a guy change simply because he’s a heel.

      • Be. Are. See.

        I guess I’m just partial to the Corey Graves idea of “Fuck this guy, I still hate him, heel or face.”

  • cabspaintedyellow

    “I’m a has-been.”

    JBL with the shockingly candid comment of the night.

    • johntcole

      I think the point was it’s better to be that than a never-was

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      He’s been on fire during this match.

  • Fester

    Honestly, Dar is my favorite cruiserweight right now exclusively because of the way he says “Alecia FAAAHHHHHHHHKKKKKSSSSSS”

    Screw the actual cruiserweight matches right now they’re boring without Ibushi.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      The entire division feels like it’s in a holding pattern until Gran Metalik and Tozawa get there.

      I feel like Milhouse waiting to get to the fireworks factory, waiting for those two to show up already.

    • SpiralTap

      He’s one of my faves because of Champagne Superkneebar.

      Anyone making that good an Oasis reference gets a pass from me.

      • Fester

        I have no clue what the champagne superkneebar is, but yes, oasis references are an easy win over me

  • Mr.Snrub

    Royal Rumble entrants so far – Bill Goldberg,Brock Lesnar,Big E,Kofi Kingston,Xavier Woods,Chris Jericho,Braun Strowman,Baron Corbin,Seth Rollins,Undertaker,Dean Ambrose,The Miz

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      That’s a pretty star studded group.

    • Fester

      James Ellsworth has to make it in I think.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      Rumble going to be LIT.

      • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

        So many unpredictable choices.

    • Ripner Cabbit

      Gonna suck when Titus O’Neil tosses all 3 New Day guys to justify there feud.

    • johntcole

      I like the star power so far.

  • johntcole

    So if this Golden Showers/Trump story can be proven is that enough to boot him from office

    • Napoleon Blownapart

      It’s most likely not true.

    • Biff ♥ You

      Golden Showers?

      • cultstatus

        How do you not know what a golden shower is?

    • Edward M

      Then we’re stuck with Pence. I’ll take the evil orange pisser over a theocracy.

    • Jackson Smith

      I don’t think a man’s perversions can boot him from office when they’re not illegal.

      I mean, it’s perfectly legal to enjoy seeing a woman urinate.

      Which Donald Trump does.

      He likes seeing women pee.

      “He” being Donald Trump, who enjoys seeing women pee.

      • djowalsen: Known Hater

        You know, I heard that somewhere.

        • djowalsen: Known Hater

          And by that, I mean that Donald Trump likes to watch women pee.

      • Ripner Cabbit

        Well the hiring hookers part isn’t necessarily legal.

    • Kenny_Reigns

      First, I’d wait for someone more credible than Buzzfeed to report this.

      But let’s pretend it’s true…no, this can’t get him booted from office. He can be impeached if he breaks American laws.

    • Aaron

      No. It would cast a monstrous spectre, especially the denial of Russian involvement bit. He’d probably resign.

    • Brooks

      Supposedly FBI is looking into allegations that trump was personally compromised by the Russians

  • RudoWakening

    Xanthippe has almost 400 friends on Instagram. She’s more popular than me and rightly so.

    • Kenny_Reigns

      I wish she’d join Snapchat instead of that other guy…

      • Aaron

        Yeah, that Chad guy keeps going on about vegetarianism. Pigs are just fun.

    • Aaron

      You don’t look as good in a bow.

  • Brian_Bayless

    No DQ being taken to task for falsely reporting Meltzer’s speculation as a news item

    https://twitter.com/davemeltzerWON/status/818994635628421120

  • Be. Are. See.

    Christ, I don’t like Ziggler or anything, but still…really?!?

    • cabspaintedyellow

      Ziggler is the rare face who turns heel because he’s frustrated with losing all the time…only to continue losing all the time as a heel.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    I’m ok with this surprise win.

  • Harry Hood

    Kick his ass zigs

  • cabspaintedyellow

    I just realized one of the big reasons I hate performance evaluation segments: it presumes that every superstar is one missed paycheck from homelessness. The notion that Foley is going to be living in a cardboard box outside Pier 1 just because Stephanie doesn’t like the job he’s doing begs the question: if you’re going to be in the poor house a week after losing your job, how big of a superstar are you, really?

    Lebron James could get released tomorrow, or lose his leg in a freak porning accident. But he’s still going to be fucking loaded, and he’s still going to be a big deal everywhere he goes. Because he’s a fucking superstar.

    • Ripner Cabbit

      But but how could you live with yourself if you are a wrestler and not working for the WWE anymore?

    • Oprah Brokeamnesia

      That’s why they all had second jobs in the New Generation!

  • JosephM

    Dolph plays a bitter, frustrated fed up wrestler who feels his time in the sun is fading fast so well.

    Who knew.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Nothing like a good Kalisto beating every few weeks.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Bwhaahahahhaha…that kid was pissed. Nice cut, Dunn.

  • cultstatus

    About to throw on ECW Heatwave 98 if anyone wants to join me.

    • JosephM

      Ooh I was there live, floor seats about six rows back!

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Hey, Apollo finally has a character!

    • Fester

      Pissed is kinda stereotypical for a black wrestler, but it’s better than “smiley, I’m just happy to be here” black wrestler.

  • Jackson Smith

    Watch out Ziggles, beating people with chairs might actually get you back over again.

    • JosephM

      One More Time chants agree with you.

  • Miko363

    I was kinda hoping the remaining 80 minutes of the show would be Dolph beating up Kalisto.

  • Bruce Chung

    Ziggler is very orange.

    • Oprah Brokeamnesia

      Well he’s used to laying on his back looking up at the lights, so naturally he does the same in a tanning bed.

  • Fester

    Guys, is Ziggler a heel now? I can’t really tell by how much ass he’s kicking with that chair.

  • Aaron

    This could be good for Crews.

  • Mr.Snrub

    So Dolph vs the Smackdown mid-card geeks?

    Eh, i can dig it. Kalisto & Apollo both have solid legit mid-card upside.

    • Be. Are. See.

      I’ve seen absolutely no upside from Apollo at all since his NXT debut, but at least Ziggler isn’t in the main event or anything, I guess.

  • Brooks

    Tough to say who gets more of a reaction. Apollo or Carmella. Both barely crickets

  • Biff ♥ You

    The heel turn loses a bit when 75% of the crowd is supporting you beating the piss out of people with a chair. Still, this is an intriguing turn.

    • chicagodem79

      Tough being a heel these days. Nothing Ziggler did there deserved any cheers kayfabe wise, but he’s still cheered for destroying dudes. Just goes to show if you show real levels of intensity, fans will cheer you.

  • SpiralTap

    Ok, I can’t do this anymore. Someone hit me up on snapchat when Disqus stops being Diqsuq

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      I don’t blame you.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    I think the big reason Dolph is getting cheered is because he’s got an edge to him.

    People cheer heels these days because heels are the only ones who really have balls anymore. Babyfaces are too sanitized. They lack that edge that many modern fans need to justify cheering them.

    • Biff ♥ You

      Fans can get behind someone that acts like a badass. Settling your problems by throwing people a beating with a chair is change we can believe in.

    • RawisStoned

      That was part of Hogans appeal. He wasn’t afraid to cheat in order to give the heels their comeuppance

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Mauro:”Dolph Ziggler has just destroyed 2….”
    Me:”Midcards?”
    Mauro:”Superstars!”
    Me:”Oh…”

  • Bones

    Yeah I can’t even post when it’s this bad, I’m not seeing anything.

    • WhoahItsMongo

      Try hitting newest comments twice in a row. It’s cleaning it up when I do that.

      • Bones

        Still not working right

    • SpiralTap

      Continuously hitting refresh isn’t cutting it.

  • Fester

    Seriously, here’s the litmus test. Cena doesn’t need to win this match. But this would make Corbin if he wins.

    • Be. Are. See.

      #CenaWinsLOL

    • cabspaintedyellow

      It makes no sense to even do this match.

      If Cena wins, it really slows Corbin’s momentum. If Corbin wins, then he just beat the No. 1 contender at the Rumble (although, realistically, they could be setting up Cena for a post-Rumble defense by having Corbin own a win over him. But that still makes no sense in the “automatic rematch clause” era, since AJ would likely get the February rematch. And that’s if Cena even wins). And nobody wants to see a schmozz ending.

      • Fester

        Cena is invincible in the fans eyes. He can lose and lose and lose and still be the only real draw in the company

      • Ripner Cabbit

        Or Corbin wins but only due to AJ interference as is the usual WWE case.

    • Biff ♥ You

      I know this is really taking a risk, but I think Corbin wins semi-clean.

      • Fester

        I really hope you’re right

    • DAJackson7

      Which means LolCenaWins

  • Bruce Chung

    Is the Wyatt Family actually aspects of Voldemort?

    Cult leader, snake, unloved man-child?

    • RawisStoned

      Here’s a fun game. Which wrestlers would be in which Harry Potter house?

  • ARRRRGH THE BARBARIAN

    You need to turn people heel on wrestlers people like. He’d get more heel heat beating Styles with a chair than he would Kalisto

  • cultstatus

    Russian soldiers feeding polar bears from their tank during WW2: http://i.imgur.com/tBQ9a3X.jpg

    • LScisco

      The crazy Eastern Front….

  • Biff ♥ You

    Disqus is pulling a Foley

  • Oprah Brokeamnesia

    Tried watching the Canucks/Predators game, but the announcers are literally putting me to sleep with their bored monotones.

  • Edward M

    Saw some clips of the New Day vs Titus feud. Looks like worst feud of the decade material.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Why does Renee get to interview Cena instead of the new girl? Renee is playing political games already!

  • Miko363

    Oh hey, it’s Cena really putting Baron Corbin out to be a threat by cutting an extra jokey promo!

    • JosephM

      He’s not being that jokey, more intense and passionate.

      • Miko363

        It got better towards the end, but he started off being so over the top that it was clearly not meant to be taken seriously.

    • Bruce Chung

      At least he didn’t call him Balding Vampire or make fun of his hair.

  • maskedcabana

    When did Renee start dressing like Blossom?

    • JosephM

      She needs a flower hat to sell the ensemble.

  • Brooks

    Renee ….what in the hell are you wearing? Downgrade.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Another thing you only ever hear now, and not in any of the older Raws I’ve been watching on the Network: “making a statement”.

    Guys wouldn’t declare the intention to make a statement. They’d go out there and kick somebody in the dick, and dare them to do something about it.

  • Biff ♥ You

    John Cena’s inflection is a cross between Andy Griffith and an evangelist tonight.

    I’m not feeling good about my Corbin prediction tonight.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    “Has Been” seems like a recurring theme tonight.

  • Roronoa FunkDoc

    Fucking hell, if we had THAT Cena for the last decade I wouldn’t hate him so much.

    • Fester

      yuuuup

  • cabspaintedyellow

    John Cena has reached that Elder Statesman phase of his career where even the people who normally boo him can’t help but throw him some Respect cheers.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      He has come full circle.

    • Edward M

      It’s hard to boo a guy who has had as many **** matches as all the all time greats (HBK, Hart, Flair, etc).

    • Vintage

      If Cena was anything other than “It’s MY TIME! THE FUTURE GOES THROUGH ME!” then I would be inclined to agree. But he’s not, so fuck him.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Bryan didn’t get his wish of letting these guys go on last. Way to show that the GM has power, guys!

  • Aaron

    I was going to make nachos, but I don’t have any cucumbers.

    • Biff ♥ You

      … Cucumbers on nachos?

  • Fester

    Dammit I was hoping the tag titles would main event tonight and Corbin/Cena would be now. The IC belt really feels more important because it’s been main eventing smackdown recently

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Love Orton in the Wyatt Family. I still don’t entirely buy it, since the whole thing somehow feels like he’s deep cover or something. But I really do hope they keep him with the stable for a good while.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      He seems to be enjoying it as well. And that’s the most important part.

    • Bruce Chung

      Orton really seems like a guy who feels more comfortable with a smaller role.

  • Bones

    What’s this about Trump and golden showers?

    • Thebraziliankid

      He can get shitcanned if proven.

      • Biff ♥ You

        Stop trying to make fetch happen.

      • Aaron

        Nope. He just gets to be a despised national embarrassment. Like he already is.

    • Napoleon Blownapart
    • Ripner Cabbit

      He apparently hired russian hookers to give him golden showers.

    • Ripner Cabbit
      • Vintage

        The documents have been circulating in Washington circles “for months,”

        Good thing they didn’t reveal this during the election or anything. Would have gotten in the way of all that riveting talk about Hillary’s emails!

    • Jackson Smith

      Golden showers? He likes ’em. The man in question being Donald Trump, who enjoys golden showers.

    • RudoWakening

      He ostensibly rented out hotels in Russia and hired ladies to pee on each other. There is also a supposed Trump sex tape from dome Russian orgy.

      • RudoWakening

        Some*

  • chicagodem79

    The Wyatts theme is a legitimately good song, it’s very catchy.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      I was just about to say. It’s legit great, like if Kurt Cobain did swamp rock instead of heroin.

  • Bruce Chung

    Hey Randy, you gonna wear new Wyatt gear?

    Nope.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Listen to that huge pop for your tag team champions!

  • Roronoa FunkDoc

    Disqus had me thinking I was watching a completely different episode for a sec lol

    • Fester

      I don’t know if I’ve ever seen it this bad.

      Besides you know, when it’s down entirely.

      • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

        Yeah, this long stretch of bad days has been very off, even by Disqus standards.

  • Vintage

    I’ve missed the show to this point, but it sounds like Ziggler’s explanation for his heel turn is the standard “You people don’t DESERVE an explanation!”

    • cabspaintedyellow

      If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!

      Unfortunately, this isn’t one of those cases.

    • chicagodem79

      He’s going on Talking Smack so I think we’ll get the explanation there.

    • Night

      54 writers on the staff, man.

    • Be. Are. See.

      It’s for the best that they’re saving it for Talking Smack, I guess.

    • Bruce Chung

      It’s better than MNF, so I better disappear.

  • LScisco

    Doomie Awards will be posted later tonight

  • Biff ♥ You

    I know that Orton is probably going to turn on Wyatt, and go back face for their WrestleMania match, but I think that would be a mistake. I think it would be cool to tease dissension between Orton and Harper, then swerve us by having the two turn on Bray and knocking him out of action for a few weeks. The ‘Orton Family’ does their thing, then a few weeks before WrestleMania, Bray comes back pissed off and ready to murder. Bam, babyface turn and turn him loose.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      This is where I hope it’s headed too. But I don’t think people would boo Orton. He’s too good of a babyface.

      • Be. Are. See.

        Orton is a good babyface? This is the first time I’ve ever heard this statement made.

        • cabspaintedyellow

          The RKO alone makes him a hotter babyface than most of the people they actually book as babyfaces. Few things drive a crowd wilder than an RKO spree.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    I had a dream Paige drove me to a doctor’s appointment. No idea what the appointment was for in the dream, but I can only imagine it had something to do with having contact with Paige.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      I recently had a dream that Roman Reigns was beating up Rick Moranis with a cooked Thanksgiving Turkey, and Ambrose was trying to talk him out of it.
      It was weird man.

      • cabspaintedyellow

        …..

        • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

          That was the same reaction I had seeing it.

  • Other Tall Guy

    Kinda miss Bray’s weird messianic promos: I know it’s wrestling and all, but they made him different than the other guys on the roster.

  • Vintage

    Yup. Read on what I’ve missed. Even when they’re pushing Ziggler as a heel, he’s the world’s biggest loser. It has to be a rib at this point.

    • Night

      67 writers on the staff, man.

    • Facts

      Hes a heel?

  • Bruce Chung

    Alyssa Milano is pushing Atkins now? WTF?

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Gable’s singlet is straight out of the Jim Powers Collection.

    • PrideOfCanada

      If it has pockets, they are likely full of roids.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    “Randy” chants, signalling how much fans buy this heel turn, and how much they buy into American Alpha.

    • chicagodem79

      Just shows how much fans like Randy Orton, they always have.

  • Edward M

    Donald Trump has hired Robert Kennedy Jr to lead commission on vaccine safety. https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/trump-to-meet-with-proponent-of-debunked-tie-between-vaccines-and-autism/2017/01/10/4a5d03c0-d752-11e6-9f9f-5cdb4b7f8dd7_story.html?utm_term=.0486e18698e3 So the one time Trump is “bipartisan” its with the anti science conspiracy theory hack son of Bobby Kennedy. God damn, can Trump do anything right?

    • Aaron

      Today we found out he’s a Goldwater Republican.

  • Biff ♥ You

    God Help Us, David Otunga just made a good point on commentary.

  • Jackson Smith

    Boy, that #1 ranking for Baylor sure is gonna last long. Wow. Getting blown out by West Virginia.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    I like that tag teams have traditional names now rather than that weird period where they were putting the word “Team” in front of everything, like we wouldn’t know the two guys wrestling in the tag division were a tag team.

    That said, at the risk of sounding like Jim Cornette, I wish we could bring back the “Express” and “Connection” names from the 80s.

  • Brian_Bayless

    Its amazing how much better Smackdown is than RAW.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      It really is.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      RAW is such a tragedy, it’s being turned into a movie with Mark Wahlberg

  • Bruce Chung

    Gable reminds me of a 80’s hair band bass player.

  • cultstatus

    Heatwave 98 gets the super serious TV-MA warning.

    • jobber123

      I forgot what happened on that show. Just blood and cat fights and f bombs?

      • cultstatus

        F bombs, no blood yet, and Sunny lost her top.

  • Mr.Snrub

    Fucking Disqus is ruining this solid episode of Smackdown so far, wrassling ain’t wrassling without talking about it with your fellow otters.

    • Fester

      noooooooooooooooooooooo

  • Jeremy Rinehart

    I caught part of the Paul Finebaum show today, and the way the ‘Bama faithful turned on the Tide, Saban, Hurts, the defense and the O.C. was amazing

  • Bruce Chung

    It’s shocking how much better Orton is as a tag wrestler.

    • Fester

      This storyline has really reguivinated him.

  • chicagodem79

    SLINGSHOT SUPLEX~! That has to add 1/2* to this match.

    • Be. Are. See.

      And it looked better than Scott Dawson’s from last week’s NXT. Probably because of Gable, but still.

    • Bruce Chung

      I really think Orton might be his generations’ best tag wrestler.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    I would be ok if Orton won the titles with Bray again, since he lost them with Harper, to create even more tension.

    • Fester

      sure why not?

  • Vintage

    For anyone that thinks titles are stupid props (i.e. Vince Russo), look at how they saved American Alpha. They feel like a much bigger deal now than they did a month ago.

    • Biff ♥ You

      They’re still not getting much of a reaction. They may need a heel turn.

      • Vintage

        Heel turns aren’t a cure-all. Look at the Usos.

  • Bruce Chung

    lol Mauro just called Wyatt the Sinister Sequoia.

    • LScisco

      *Cornette face*

  • Biff ♥ You

    If you look up the definition of ‘Perfectly Acceptable Wrestling’, you’ll see a picture of this tag match.

  • Phylicia Rashad to be in Black Panther movie. That’s rad.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      If I were the bad guys, I’d be way more scared of Claire Huxtable than just about anyone in Black Panther’s retinue.

  • Edward M

    I love how discus is bringing up comments from 20 minutes ago about people complaining that discus is bringing comments up from 20 minutes ago.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      It’s a never ending cycle.

  • Oprah Brokeamnesia

    Quick, get him outside, we gotta go to break!

    (It’ll probably come back to the Orton chinlock too)

  • After 20 years of refusal, I’m thinking of using favourites in my browser.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      They are ok every now and then.

    • Oprah Brokeamnesia

      I have the bookmark bar active. Has all the shortcuts to sites I need.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Disqus is worse than drinking a Dick-flavored Capri Sun.

  • Oprah Brokeamnesia

    That smoking commercial has to realize that they 1% they dropped teenage smoking is irrelevant right?

    It would fall under the margin of error more than anything.

    (And using the Big Bad Wolf and pigs to get teens to quit smoking… is WWE writing these?!)

    • Be. Are. See.

      99% of them remind me that I haven’t had a cigarette in a while and I light up. Fucking idiots.

  • Macklin Man Without Password

    Maybe Thor 2 works better if the Dark Elves designs were better. Their look is weak.

  • Bruce Chung

    “Bray Wyatt is a big man with a big gas tank.” – Mauro.

    He’s fat?

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      The tank with the Ferrari Engine.

  • Bruce Chung

    Bad angle on those ground and pound punches. Not even close.

    • Mr.Snrub

      Chad’s got to tighten up on those shots regardless of camera angle.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    I kind of want to see everyone from here complain to Disqus about the issue, just to see their surprise that a good chunk of people are using their chat engine so passionately and regularly.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Man, Gable’s draping DDT sell is top notch.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Ugh, I don’t want to see fucking Randy/Bray again.

  • Daniel O’Reilly

    Kind of a lame ending.

  • Oprah Brokeamnesia

    Orton jobs… to silence…

  • maskedcabana

    Did Mauro say Okada roll?

    • Oprah Brokeamnesia

      O’ Connor.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Yes, and it’s always jarring to hear.

    • Bruce Chung

      Is that a California roll with crab meat or something?

    • Glenn_Frogington_The_3rd

      The O’Conner Roll

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    I’m liking this development.

  • chicagodem79

    Well….that adds some intrigue……

  • LScisco
  • Mr.Snrub

    Randy’s stubble is 0.04% longer than usual this week, that’s about as much Wyatt Family as he’ll go sadly.

  • Be. Are. See.

    This should lead to the return of the World’s Largest Mathlete, I guess.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Upside Down Sheamus!

  • chicagodem79

    Are they in St. Louis tonight? I haven’t seen this much face heat for Orton for a long time.

    • Jackson Smith

      Baton Rouge

      • chicagodem79

        I guess Baton Rouge really loves Orton lol.

    • Aaron

      They didn’t boo Crews enough for it to be STL.

  • Vintage

    I realllllllly want this to be a case of Orton playing the super long con to make Harper look like a buffoon and get him out of the way, for good. That’d be some top-notch storytelling.

    • Bruce Chung

      Orton: Sure.

  • Jackson Smith

    “Goddamn kids!”

  • johntcole

    Say what you will about Orton, damn do most crowds love him.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      I agree.

    • chicagodem79

      When he eventually turns on them, the crowd will go apeshit.

  • Oprah Brokeamnesia

    You can tell ratings etc. are down… Vince is going back to the big guys again.

    • johntcole

      There are worse choices to push than Corbin.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Nice video package for Corbin.

  • LScisco

    “I made extreme gains due to some under the counter substances and….”

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    That 2008 Rumble surprise still shocks me to this day.

    • Be. Are. See.

      I remember my reaction of “Oh, well, I guess HHH isn’t winning after all.”

      • Fester

        exactly

    • Mr.Snrub

      IMPOSSIBRU!

    • Napoleon Blownapart

      I like how the crowd erupted and suddenly they were like, shit we’re supposed to boo him.

  • juvydriver

    Always weird when a guy like Orton joins a group like the Wyatt’s and doesn’t bother to change his tights or anything.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      Even just loose slacks and a tank top would help immensely.

    • W.S.

      At least he’s finally starting to grow a beard.

  • Biff ♥ You

    Damn, SmackDown’s almost over already. This show zips by like crazy.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      The mark of a good wrestling show.

      • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

        Agreed.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Raw would still have over 100+ minutes.

  • A Wrestling god

    I don’t catch Smackdown often so can someone tell me why the hell there are four announcers?

    • Fester

      Todd doesn’t talk during the matches. So 3 announcers and a host

    • Daniel O’Reilly

      Because there are, basically, even though Tom does nothing for long stretches.

  • ziggaman730

    if only Corbin could wrestle in his snow hat to hide his balding. First they put a shirt on him to over that WEIRD fucking stomach of his, next they gotta do something bout his doo.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      What’s crazy is that two of their biggest stars in history were either balding (Hogan) or completely bald (Austin).

  • Edward M

    Baron Corbin is too ugly to ever be a main eventer.

  • LScisco

    YIKES the color scheme on that WM logo sucks!

    • WWF1987

      Most do.

  • Bruce Chung

    Tricentennial? Of what? New Orleans 300?

  • LScisco

    Triple H ripping off the Rock? Great….

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    For a second, I thought that Triple H was doing a Triple H impression.

  • Fester

    Wait, Bryan’s at Smackdown, but Shane and Renee are doing Talking Smack tonight? WTF?

  • Bruce Chung

    lol Eva Marie name drop.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    I still can’t believe New Day lost their match at WM. That was the only finish to actually make me angry, since you knew the League of Nations were on their way out, and it was only done to set up Barrett’s line of “No trio can beat us!” to intro Foley, Austin and HBK.

    • Night

      We’re making stars, baby!

  • Aaron

    Reigns is the epitome of empty suit.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Almost an hour and a half in before we get an authority figure. Progress.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Daniel Bryan sighting!

  • Mr.Snrub

    So is Wrestlemania just going to cycle through 6-8 big southern sunny markets from now on?

    • Biff ♥ You

      :: Shrug ::

  • Biff ♥ You

    Daniel Bryan: “Who is La Luchadora? Could that be Eva Marie?”

    Becky Lynch: “No way, Eva Marie is way too vain to wear a mask.”

    LOL

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Ugh, Alexa is so fucking good-looking. Like, if I were a woman, I would hate that bitch.

    • RudoWakening

      It’s not fair that someone is that gorgeous and also good at wrestling. And BUDDY FUCKING MURPHY gets to hit that shit.

  • LScisco

    This Luchador stuff is so Memphis but it’s great

  • WWF1987

    They need to do another MSG Mania.

    • Cory M

      How about just another live televised MSG show period.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    This women’s angle is also so much better than the Charlotte/Bayley, Sasha Banks/Nia Jax angles.

  • ziggaman730

    i wanna bang alexa bliss.

  • Bruce Chung

    Bliss getting furious is almost as funny as people turning on Lynch.

  • LScisco

    They really love making Becky look like an awkward dork.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Jokes on them. That’ll make her more relatable to the fans.

  • Be. Are. See.

    I’m fine with a cage match, as long as Alexa isn’t losing.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Well, that should keep me interested into next weeks show.

  • chicagodem79

    A cage match created which has a point?!?!?! GOOD GOD Smackdown does it again lol.

    • Bruce Chung

      It’s literally the reason for a cage. To prevent interference and heels running.

  • Biff ♥ You

    Whoa, SHIT, women’s steel cage match for the women’s title next week.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Gotta love Smackdown!

    • chicagodem79

      And even better, there’s an actual point for it existing rather than just randomly pulled out of nowhere.

  • Bruce Chung

    Grandma jobber.

  • Jackson Smith

    JBL’s constant disgust at the new people they find to be on shows works.

    • ziggaman730

      SD has definitely freshened up JBL.

  • LScisco

    This match deserves Jim Cornette commentary.

  • Fester

    Crazy Aunt Flo Jobberella is great!

  • Mr.Snrub

    LOL at this jobber

  • cabspaintedyellow

    A steel cage match to settle an issue that requires a steel cage?

    It’s almost like the person writing this show understands pro wrestling.

  • maskedcabana

    This is the jobbiest looking woman’s jobber ever.

  • Aaron

    Nice jab at Arn.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    JBL:”It’s Jack Gallagher’s sister!”
    Ok, that made me laugh hard.

  • Edward M

    Its good to see James Ellsworth is already following in the tradition of the last big comedy jobber (Santino Marello) and is getting himself some poon tang.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Wonder how many Ellsworth will get? Satino got 3.

  • Biff ♥ You

    “It’s Jack Gallagher’s sister, Susan Boyle!”

    LOL part deux

  • Obi1Jabroni

    Lol what the fuck is this woman?

  • DAJackson7

    The great granddaughter of Mildred Burke? The fuck like five people get that

  • cabspaintedyellow

    It’s incredible how much JBL has improved simply by being removed from Raw.

  • Mr.Snrub

    Smackdown is in Memphis next week!

    Fireball spot in a Cage, i can smell it coming!!!

  • The 1987 Survivor Series called, and they need their woman’s wrestler back.

  • Fester

    Wait, why is Carmella having so much trouble putting away this random jobber?

  • BretHart1987

    Let’s Go Jobber!

  • Cory M

    “Let’s go jobber!” LOL.

  • Obi1Jabroni

    I hope she gives birth to a hand

  • LScisco

    OH SHIT. WHAT WAS THAT?!?!?!?

  • Be. Are. See.

    JBL making fun of the jobber has made this match light year’s better than it has any right being.

  • Bruce Chung

    So a botched inverted side Russian leg sweep?

  • cabspaintedyellow

    I have no idea whose fault that was.

    • Aaron

      Arn, Jr. couldn’t do a reverse Russian leg sweep.

  • Biff ♥ You

    LOL, what a dumpster fire match

  • Daniel O’Reilly

    One of these times the jobber needs to deck Ellsworth.

  • OOOF that was an awful bump.

    Ellsworth hits every cue with near perfect comedic timing, you have to give him that.

  • Vintage

    Was that supposed to be a Flatliner? What the fuck WAS that?

  • Obi1Jabroni

    Wait… 4 fucking announcers for this shit?

    • Fester

      no they have 3 announcers

  • Cory M

    Still with 4 announcers?

    • Fester

      3 and a host who doesn’t talk during matches.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Surprised Iggy Azalea hasn’t sued over this entrance music yet.

  • Charismatic eNegro Jef Vinson

    …’sup.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Hey, haven’t seen you in awhile.

  • tannerfamilyfun92

    Be a star, WWE. Make fun of the frumpy woman’s wrestler.

    Even if it was hilarious.

  • Be. Are. See.

    I feel like the “OMG FOUR ANNOUNCERS” thing is just being done to troll me at this point.

    • Oprah Brokeamnesia

      Supersize everything!
      Announcers/show lengths etc.

      It will burn fans out on the OTHER promotions! Not ours.

  • Fester

    I laugh every time I hear that little Undertaker gargle at the end of his promo Monday.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Yeah, that was really awkward.

    • Lurker

      I laughed to myself all day thinking about it.

  • LScisco

    The Undertaker just needs to go away.

    • Napoleon Blownapart

      Isn’t Wrestlemania going to be his last match?

      • JAWAS ♥ SMOAK

        You’re funny.

    • Edward M

      He still draws. As long as he can walk to the ring (even with a walker), Vince will let him wrestle till the day he rests in peace.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Ok, I like how they’re adding guys on that Rumble graphic.

  • Biff ♥ You

    James Ellsworth and Golden Girl Jobber should cross pollinate and create the UberJobber.

    • Oprah Brokeamnesia

      We already have Dolph!

  • chicagodem79

    That Royal Rumble promo picture didn’t have Kevin Owens LMAO, that tells you a lot about his standing in the company.

    • Edward M

      They wouldn’t be able to fit anyone else in the picture.

  • mattmcandrew

    a great example of amusing commentary making a shit and pointless match watchable.

    • chicagodem79

      That was Superstars and Wrestling Challenge back in the day lol.

  • Mr.Snrub

    Did they edit out Grandpataker’s stomach grumbling at the end of that promo?

    • Fester

      Nope!!!

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Nope.

    • Biff ♥ You

      Nope, it was there. Undercreaker sounds better to me though.

  • jobber123

    I’m thinking disqus is mildly malfunctioning now. I’m getting comments from all over the place

    • Kenny_Reigns

      I just refreshed and got a ton from an hour ago.

    • The G*d D*mn John Petrie

      I just had one pop up from 8 minutes earlier. There’s been worse, but i just noticed it.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      I’d take “mildly malfunctioning” over whatever’s happening now.

    • LScisco

      The time frame for old comments is getting shorter

  • cabspaintedyellow

    That jobber is a glorious throwback to mid-80s women’s wrestling, when there was virtually no crossover between being in the business and being fuckable.

    • Biff ♥ You

      She looks like someone that was drudged up out of Moolah’s wrestling school/bordello.

  • DirecTV Now sent me a survey.

    They ain’t gonna like what I have to say.

    • Kenny_Reigns

      From working at AT&T, I can tell you they don’t care. They only care about the EPS score – what you rate them from 0-5.

      • I gave a “6” on likely to recommend.

        I’m giving honest feedback. If they don’t listen to it, Hulu is offering a great service soon that will probably work great on the free Apple TV they sent me.

  • JAWAS ♥ SMOAK

    Goddamn, just give Barry four more years. This is just making me sad.

    • Vintage

      It’s making me angry, because a lot of guys can’t get past “Yeah, but he’s black.”

      • JAWAS ♥ SMOAK

        I still can’t believe a black guy made it in before a woman. Like Patton Oswalt said, the election proved America is more sexist than racist. And America is really fucking racist.

  • Bruce Chung

    Still laughing that McAvoy is also playing Legion.

    • Daniel O’Reilly

      Sure, why not?

  • Be. Are. See.

    Well, Split had me until it said “M. Night Shyamalan.”

    • JosephM

      The Visit started his slow (slooooooow) comeback.

      • Be. Are. See.

        The shitty diaper thing completely ruined that movie for me.

  • jobber123

    Show new comment-and its from 44 minutes ago….booooooo disqus

  • Biff ♥ You

    Solomonster had a great idea: make La Luchadora Sasha Banks, who is desperate to get away from Stephanie McMahon on RAW. So Bryan makes a trade with Foley, Sasha for what was going to be SmackDown’s newest signing, Mickie James.

  • Vintage

    https://twitter.com/jrhwriting/status/819009016856776704

    Let’s NOT forget that last match when it’s time to name Worst Match of the Year in 11 months.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      Eh, if jobber matches are going to start making WMOTY ballots, it’s going to throw off the criteria.

  • BretHart1987

    I just found the Starrcade 1991 pre-show on Dailymotion. What could have they been previewing? There will be matches, and we have no idea what they will be. Now give us $25.

  • Ripner Cabbit

    Fuck Surf’s Up 2.

    Take one of my favorite movies of all time and turn it into whatever the fuck this is.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Yeah, the first one was really fun.

      • Ripner Cabbit

        It really had such a great style choice that made it different than the other animated movies of its time. Also Jeff Bridges.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Oooh, next week Smackdown is in Memphis? Perfect place for the women’s cage match angle!

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Surf’s Up 2
    Because TNA Can’t Win the Gooker Every Year

  • Jackson Smith

    Becky. Alexa. Caged Heat.

  • Biff ♥ You

    Renee, Alexa and Becky on the screen at the same time? Lil’ Biff approves.

  • Bruce Chung

    Ellsworth…friend zoned.

  • Biff ♥ You

    Okay, I lol’d at ‘Holy Crap!’

  • The G*d D*mn John Petrie

    Clicked to load 2 new comments… posted 20 & 34 minutes ago. The fuck?

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Vintage Disqus!

  • JosephM

    Hey look- Gorilla position!

  • Lurker

    Everyone should interrupt Dasha 2 seconds into her question to cover up her awfulness.

  • Jackson Smith

    Since that time I was supposed to graduate high school, LOL

  • maskedcabana

    She better dress Ellsworth like Enzo.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    They’re pretending James Ellsworth has never been with a woman before when he’s brought up having kids before.

    • Lurker

      I guess you can technically have kids without having kissed a woman before…right?

      • W.S.

        Maybe he’s a frequent sperm donor? 🙂

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Yeah, odd continuity choice there.

  • Bruce Chung

    Is Styles gonna get through into again? It’s like a running joke at this point.

  • Be. Are. See.

    AJ is awesome. This needs to be said every week. Or every time he’s on screen. Or talks.

    • Mr. Money On The Table

      There used to be people who felt this way about the girl version.

  • Ripner Cabbit

    Beat Up John Cena is the best catchphrase ever that has no right to be a catchphrase.

  • Biff ♥ You

    AJ, you beautiful bastard.

  • Jackson Smith

    “Do your best AJ Styles impression…and beat up John Cena!”

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Ohhhh, he’s going out for commentary.

    For a second, I thought they were playing him into the backstage segment.

  • AJ does everything.

  • Biff ♥ You

    Styles out for commentary? My prediction for a semi-clean win for Corbin is very much doable. AJ distraction, End of Days, shocking pin, new star made.

    • If they weren’t doing Cena/Undertaker this year, I could see them doing Cena/Corbin like they did with Wyatt and Rusev the last few years, but actually pulling the trigger on Corbin.

  • Andrew Champagne

    Remember 2011, when there were two factions of useless, directionless midcarders (except for CM Punk)? That was special. Watching that 40-man Rumble now.

    • Be. Are. See.

      As opposed to the 2017 Rumble where it’s a bunch of part timers who as all just as likely to win the Rumble, have a huge Mania match, and disappear the next night.

  • Mr.Snrub

    Not feeling this UK tourney, indy show with a WWE logo.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      The matches will be good, but there isn’t really a hook like there was with the CWC, where you had some genuine names in there alongside longtime veterans and hungry newcomers.

      This, it’s just hungry newcomers, some of whom are people you may have heard of, maybe, like Mark Andrews.

      • Ripner Cabbit

        MANDrews!

    • WWF1987

      Total knee jerk reaction by WWE.

  • BretHart1987
    • Mr. Money On The Table

      That….That is a terrible shirt.

  • Edward M

    “smokers earn 20% less than non smokers.” Correlation does not imply causation. The reason for that is lower income people tend to be more likely to partake in vices, because being poor is stressful. Quiting smoking won’t get you an extra 20% income. What a dumb fucking commercial.

    • Curtis Williams

      Everything about them is fucking dumb

    • Ripner Cabbit

      Rich people can afford Coke all the time.

    • I’m gonna respectfully disagree, becuase if I were hiring for a position and someone comes in smelling like cigarettes, I probably hold that against them.

  • BretHart1987

    Did he say slap or slut?

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Probably slap, but his accent is so thick, he makes it sound like he says stuff that’s way worst.

  • LScisco

    Yeah, a feud with Alicia Fox. That’ll get me to watch 205 Live!

  • Bruce Chung

    Balding Vampire is balding.

    • ziggaman730

      lol i loved when that one crowd was chanting rogaine at him.

  • Cory M

    Bald Corbin time.

  • Lurker

    So if Cedric doesn’t go nuclear on Alicia for kissing her stalker, he’s just a cuck right?

  • cabspaintedyellow

    I enjoy listening to Noam Dar talk.

    • Fester

      He’s great!

    • Ripner Cabbit

      Eventually he’ll team up with Becky Lynch and just imaging the conversations.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Go Corbin go! Go Corbin go!

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Corbin’s entrance is kind of great.

  • Biff ♥ You

    C’mon, SmackDown! Reward that faith we all have in you!

  • Mr.Snrub

    Interesting new tron for Baron Corbin there.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Let’s go Corbin!

  • Be. Are. See.

    Only 12 minutes of airtime left? Bah. I actually want to see this match and stuff.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    I BRUSH YO MOUF LIKE CO-GATE

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Alright, I NEED a gif of that girl bopping her hand along to Cena’s song.

  • Edward M

    I love John Cena as a wrestler, but everytime he enters the ring with $500 worth of merchandise on him, I remember I hate him.

  • Andrew Champagne

    Oh god, the Ted DiBiase Jr./Maryse “dating” phase. THAT was awkward.

    • Mr.Snrub

      That angle was so bad even Maryse had to throw in the towel on her whole career for a few years.

    • Night

      Like negative chemistry.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Corbin does this for the money, Cena does this cause he loves it!

    • Oprah Brokeamnesia

      …what a mark!

    • BretHart1987

      The ‘Prize Fighter” Baron Corbin. Oh, wait, didn’t we use that moniker already?

  • Curtis Williams

    Watching this final Obama speech feels like I’m watching a funeral

    • cabspaintedyellow

      I mean, in a way, isn’t it?

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Now would be a good time for Otunga to mention he and Cena were tag team champions once.

  • Ripner Cabbit

    I want AJ to just slug Otunga for the “You’ve had a good year, Cena’s had a good decade” comment.

  • Fester

    Corbin better fucking win this, even if it’s by AJ-ference.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Otunga:” AJ, you’ve had a good year, Cena’s done this for a decade!”
    Another surprisingly strong line from Otunga.

  • jobber123

    Yikes those Doomie results are a really bad look for this place. Nxt as the best promotion in 2016….wow lmao.

    • Biff ♥ You

      I don’t agree with it, but it is a WWE-centric blog, so I can at least understand it.

    • LScisco

      Lots of people don’t watch non-WWE stuff

  • Mikey

    How’s Smackdown? Power went out so my Dvr only recorded 15 minutes

    • Be. Are. See.

      Solid as always, outside of the Carmella/Jobber match.

      • Curtis Williams

        Jobber was on Smackdown?!

    • Biff ♥ You

      The usual breezy, fun show. Really good tag title match tonight.

    • WWF1987

      Great.

  • Biff ♥ You

    Baron Corbin looks like a right bastard, cocky and cool. The wolf t-shirt makes him look a bit too trucker-ish though. Needs a different t-shirt.

    • Oprah Brokeamnesia

      But his branding! He’s a lone wolf!

  • JAWAS ♥ SMOAK

    I think I may miss the Barack/Biden team most of all. Biden actually seemed dedicated to helping Obama, instead of pushing his own shit through or working towards his own future campaign. Plus, you know, the memes.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      They’re the only President/VP in history I could imagine knocking back beers at the end of the day.

      • Ripner Cabbit

        I picture Regan and Bush Sr doing the same thing, not that I like either of them.

    • Napoleon Blownapart

      He should have run.

    • Have you heard about the latest Trump scandal.

      If not, urine for a treat.

      • JAWAS ♥ SMOAK

        So that’s why #goldenshower was trending on Twitter. I was too scared to investigate.

    • LScisco

      If Barack was willing to back Biden he would’ve beaten Hillary and would’ve won the 2016 presidential election. I’m convinced Biden didn’t run because Obama refused to endorse him. Horrible calculation IMO.

      • Ripner Cabbit

        I think it was more Biden’s sons death that kept him from running. He wasn’t emotionally settled from it early enough to be able to run a strong campaign. I figure Obama would of backed him strong.

        • LScisco

          I dunno, I don’t completely buy that, especially since Beau wanted his dad to run.

  • Disqus b cray.

    • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

      Disqus, why you acking so cray cray?

  • Today I searched DirecTV Now’s on demand catalog for “Guardians of the Galaxy.” One of the results it recommended was “The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.”

    What in the actual fuck is that about?

  • Be. Are. See.

    Cena looks really off here.

    • ziggaman730

      i have confidence he will be ready by rumbe for the 2 of them to aat minimum go 4 stars.

  • Bruce Chung

    Somebody is able to get thrown into Styles.

  • The G*d D*mn John Petrie

    Cena’s wrestling? Jeez, SmackDown’s main event might have more viewers than RAW’s this week…

  • Edward M

    If this golden shower thing is real, then it is serious and a big problem for USA. It means Trump likes doing perverted things in Russia, and Putin probably knows all of them and can use them all against Trump. That makes for excellent blackmail.

    • Napoleon Blownapart

      The allegations Michael Cohen are far more serious. Also the easiest to verify.

      • Edward M

        Not necessarily that the golden shower is serious by itself. Its the ability to be blackmailed over it which makes it very troubling.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Got a notification from the WWE app confirming the Alexa/Becky steel cage match, noting it’s the first-ever women’s steel cage match in SD history.

    Another reason I love SDL: the only time they hammered on “OMG HERSTORY!” is through an app notification.

  • At least Corbin’s not dressed like a turd.

  • Andrew Champagne

    Matt Striker, on Husky Harris in the 2011 Rumble: “This kid looks like this NOW at 23, imagine what he’ll look like at 30.” Pretty sure Bray Wyatt isn’t what he meant.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    JBL pretending like no one knew who AJ was when he debuted at the Rumble is the dumbest thing I’ve heard on commentary tonight.

  • Bruce Chung

    Wow, Cena let Balding Vampire stop a shoulder block.

  • chicagodem79

    Otunga is being extra annoying during this match.

  • Biff ♥ You

    Cena is making Baron look pretty good; his usual moves aren’t having much effect (so far).

  • Bruce Chung

    That was not the Deep Six.

    • Be. Are. See.

      AJ agrees.

  • Bruce Chung

    And Styles called out Mauro on the Deep Six call.

  • jobber123

    Cena got another mainstream movie role, some teen comedy called The Pact

    • Mr.Snrub

      Yeah that was on his IMDB for awhile now. He plays a dad who joins up with a couple fellow dads to make sure their daughters don’t get defiled on prom night or something.

  • chicagodem79

    AJ correcting folks on the proper names of wrestling moves, what doesn’t he do?

  • Andrew Champagne

    Yeah, Disqus is having major issues. I’m getting comments from 29, 24, and 36 minutes ago.

  • Biff ♥ You

    AJ and JBL making fun of Otunga is funny.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    This has been a perfectly acceptable match.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Surprising chemistry between these two.

    • maskedcabana

      Cena’s usually pretty good against big stiffs.

      • cabspaintedyellow

        ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

  • Bruce Chung

    lolCenawins

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    I’m….I’m a bit upset by that finish.

    • Biff ♥ You

      My powers of prognostication have failed me. I let Dave down.

    • ziggaman730

      u dont want Cena going in strong?

  • Be. Are. See.

    Welp, Cena’s back.

  • Biff ♥ You

    JBL is corpsing

  • ziggaman730

    now thts a win.

  • Fester

    Fuck that finish

  • BretHart1987

    That kid in the blue t-shirt’s reaction was priceless.

  • Daniel O’Reilly

    That didn’t have enough time to develop.

  • Biff ♥ You

    Ugh, well fuck. At least he made him look pretty good.

  • Jackson Smith

    Ha. Clean as a whistle, enjoy Big Match John allll over your face Corbin.

  • PrideOfCanada

    THANKSOBAMALOL

    • PrideOfCanada

      Sorry. Wires crossed.

  • Facts

    Watching WK 11. Ahhh it brings a smile to my face.

  • Mikey

    Got to watch the last match.

    Cena wasn’t Jobbin to Corbin. Decent match to boot

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Nice to see that the company thinks so highly of Corbin.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    The crowd reaction shots have made this a banner night for /r/whitepeoplegifs.

  • chicagodem79

    Eh, I would’ve rather it be a DQ, but I’m ok with Cena winning

  • Lurker

    I don’t know what the big deal is, Trump would be like the 78th WWE hall of famer to hire prostitutes to piss on a bed.

    • Edward M

      Vladimir Putin can’t black mail any of those. He can blackmail Trump with this if its true.

      • Lurker

        Putin knows about all of Arnold Skaaland’s skeletons, believe me.

      • Biff ♥ You

        How? The point of blackmail is to keep someone in line with the threat of releasing incriminating evidence. If everyone already knows, there’s nothing to blackmail him with. And for fuck’s sake, is Donald Trump the kind of guy you can blackmail? He would probably admit to it and gloat.

        • Edward M

          No legitimate sites are reporting on it. Only conspiracy type stuff. And there could be worse stuff they could blackmail him with.

  • Edward M

    I’m glad Cena won. Corbin is nowhere near the level he needs to be beating Cena. Winners are able to take their shirt off in public.

  • Be. Are. See.

    Meh ending to another solid Smackdown. Oh well. Cage match next week!

  • Which one are we doing: #inCENArator or #LOLCENAWINS?

    • Daniel O’Reilly

      Both at various intervals.

  • JosephM

    InCENArator flames stoked again!

    • Daniel O’Reilly

      Gotta keep it going for AJ.

  • “Yep Mode” Abeyance Brown ©

    Outside of Disqus crapping out, and Cena’s quick victory against Corbin, it was another good episode of Smackdown.

    • JBL burying Carmella’s opponent (Thunderkitty on the indy scene?) was low class too, but the first hour and half was a good show.

  • Mikey

    Is it Becky and Alexa in the cage next week?

    • djowalsen: Known Hater

      yepper.

  • Is Trump hiring prostitutes in Russia just to watch them pee better or worse than if he’d actually had sex with them?

    • Ripner Cabbit

      I guess better for him especially since it was only done because of his and his followers hatred of Obama.

    • Matthew Maynard Adams

      Technically if you’re just paying to watch them pee they aren’t prostitutes, at least for that particular transaction. Same thing for hiring 2 of them to lez out while you sit and watch and beat off. As long as you don’t touch each other it’s not prostitution.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    At this rate, I wouldn’t be surprised if WWE starts moving all its divisions to the Network, one-by-one. We get a women’s show, a tag team show, a UK show, before the main roster somehow no longer exists.

  • Oh man, I want to give that show Taboo a shot but it’s like 1.3 hours tonight.

  • johntcole

    I just realized if Adam Cole and Kyle O’Reilly do sign with WWE by April that’s both of the main event talent from ROH’s biggest show of the year leaving them high and dry not 4 months after being promoted to such a prominent spot.

    Yikes.

  • Fester

    Here’s Alexander totally not acknowledging that his girlfriend kissed her stalker live on television last night.

    • cabspaintedyellow

      Alexander’s only definable character traits are that he loses all the time and he’s probably a cuck.

    • Marvkie Post – #10

      That Hamilton play has gotten weird af

  • PrideOfCanada

    This may be a lame storyline, but at least it’s a storyline.

    If anything, at least it’s given us “A-LEE-SHA FAAAAAAWX.”

  • LScisco

    Sorry ESPN but women’s basketball is not comparable to men’s basketball regarding records

    • djowalsen: Known Hater

      Agreed, it’s not the same. Talent is not as concentrated, the top players don’t play all four years.

  • The G*d D*mn John Petrie

    Yeah, the Trump/Russia story has taken a weird turn… AND THAT’S SAYING SOMETHING.

    • LScisco

      I find it somewhat amusing that Putin seems to be trolling America

    • chicagodem79

      They’ll need a War and Peace length book to tell the story of this election and Trump’s Presidency (if it lasts 4 years). I’m becoming more and more convinced something will happen to cause him to resign.

  • Andrew Champagne

    Wow. Remember when Tyler Reks was a thing? The Network is wonderful.

    • Lurker

      Ricky Ortiz baby! Rally up!

  • Biff ♥ You

    Noam Dar is a creeper

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Noam Dar should get his own late night talk show on the Network. I could listen to this man talk for hours.

  • Fester

    ALECIIAAAAA FAAAAAAHHHHHHKKKKSSSSS!!!

  • Facts

    Outback one should become John Cena’s manager

  • Facts

    I mean Bob Backlund not Outback 1

  • Facts

    Howard Smackdown was it good or bad probably a little of both maybe

  • Facts

    Stacked text to speech is great isn’t it

  • cabspaintedyellow

    They should give Dar a cartoonishly over-the-top, “Mr. Wonderful” entrance theme about what a ladies’ man he is. And have him sing it.

    • Ripner Cabbit

      Just have him sing a cover of I’m Too Sexxy.

  • PrideOfCanada

    The two most over things about Alicia Fox:

    1. “My favourite match was with Melina and Alicia Fox.”
    2. “AH-LEE-SHA FAAAAAAAAAAAAAWX!”

    What a 10-year career!

    • Lurker

      Don’t forget her nailing Nia Jax with that box.

      • cabspaintedyellow

        Don’t forget her nailing Nia Jax with that box baaaaawwwwwwxxxx.

        FTFY

  • Bruce Chung

    Mayo says best by December.

    2015.

    • Daniel O’Reilly

      You shouldn’t get salmonella or anything.

    • Curtis Williams

      Eat up.

  • Oprah Brokeamnesia

    1-0 and the Canucks are pretty much phoning this one in.

    At least my Spurs are winning…

  • Biff ♥ You

    Alicia FOCKS

  • Facts

    Golden showers golden showers golden showers for a WWE Hall of Famer

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Crowd is dead. WWE needs to cut bait and rebrand 205 Live as 208 Taped.

    • Ripner Cabbit

      Yea just tape it before SD and the crowd will be much hotter for it.

    • W.S.

      If they taped it alongside NXT the crowds would be hot and they could edit the matches like they did for the CWC!

  • Oprah Brokeamnesia

    Cena should have won that match… he is facing Styles at the Rumble.

    Corbin’s time will come.

  • Andrew Champagne

    Mason Ryan looked like a major star at the 2011 Rumble when he tossed Khali on his own.

    • Lurker

      Meh, Beth Phoenix did the same thing in 2010.

      • Andrew Champagne

        The difference is, 2010 was a fantastic Rumble with lots of terrific subplots. 2011 staggered home after the Punk/Nexus stuff ended, so there weren’t as many shining moments.

        • Lurker

          Mason Ryan making out with Khali while eliminating him would’ve brought it up to *1/2

    • ziggaman730

      hahaha, remember thta goof?

    • cultstatus

      uhhhh

  • Oprah Brokeamnesia

    Was that Thunder Kitty in with Carmella tonight? It kind of looked like her.

    She looked extremely hesitant and bad in there tonight.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    What caused Noam Dar to miss school as a child?

    Chicken poooooooxxxxx

    • cultstatus

      What is his favorite article of clothing?

      His soooooooooooooooxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

  • The G*d D*mn John Petrie

    I will totally believe Trump now if he promises all of America a Golden Shower of Prosperity.

  • maskedcabana

    They’re definitely giving these guys time for this match.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    Part of me wonders if Dar’s gimmick is a reactiont o Vince finally getting around to seeing the second Austin Powers movie.

  • Biff ♥ You

    Cedric sells like a million bucks.

  • Andrew Champagne

    Out comes Cena in the ugly purple shirt.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    OMG HE KICKED HIS FUCKING MOUTH OFF

  • The G*d D*mn John Petrie

    “Don’t pee on my head and say it’s rain. I pay some of the most beautiful women in the world to do that and can totally tell the difference!”

  • Lurker

    Are we sure it’s “Noam Dar?” Or is it Nick Carr and nobody can understand him?

    • Jackson Smith

      That would be an amusing twist in a few months

  • Macklin Man Without Password

    Heimdall really is a dreadful Asgardian. Every time he shows up he’s committing treason!

  • Matt_Indeed.

    It’s pretty clear that we never deserved Barack Obama.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    If Cedric doesn’t dump Alicia after this, no fan could possibly respect him.

  • Daniel O’Reilly

    Disqus, I hate you.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    “Tozawa: Coming Soon”

    Oh no, they’re giving him the Emmalina treatment.

    • Matt_Indeed.

      Does that mean he’ll be wearing a bikini?

  • Macklin Man Without Password

    I might be high because I am sorta liking Thor The Dark World.

    • Oprah Brokeamnesia

      I have to go back and rewatch it. I don’t remember liking it the first time through, but I had just moved and that was the night 1 watch.

      • Macklin Man Without Password

        I have long considered it the worst MCU movie and the only one that was actively bad. It’s better than my first viewings. Still bottom of the pile, but not in an insulting way.

    • Matt_Indeed.

      Never saw it.

      • Macklin Man Without Password

        Before now I would have advised you to actively avoid it. Now? I still cannot heartily recommend it but it’s fine.

    • Kenny_Reigns

      I hate that movie sooooo much. Tom Hiddleston almost single-handedly saved it, but it was too great a task for him.

  • Matt_Indeed.

    It’s almost like the Obama presidency came 50 years too early. We needed to completely implode on ourselves and destroy the very thing that built us…our abundant amounts of ignorance and racism…BEFORE we had a guy like that run our country. It feels like a waste.

    • Napoleon Blownapart

      Remember, his approval rating first fell when he spoke out against a cop arresting a black professor.

  • Oprah Brokeamnesia

    Wasn’t Alicia Fox the one that Kevin Dunn is all obsessed over?

    • Ripner Cabbit

      Probably, why else would she of lasted so long?

    • W.S.

      Yes.

  • maskedcabana

    Do they give Emmy’s to the WWE cause Fox just won one.

  • cabspaintedyellow

    RIP anyone wearing headphones

  • PrideOfCanada

    Oh my God.

    That was a legendarily bad performance by Alicia Fox.

    Wrestling history.

    • juvydriver

      So, -6* ?

  • Biff ♥ You

    I was just about to compliment Cedric Alexander for not being a complete puss… but holy shit, Alicia Fox trying to out-terrify Stephanie McMahon’s shriek and winning makes me shudder.

  • Andrew Champagne

    And there’s the pop for Diesel at #32. THIS is what caused his disastrous run later that year. Thanks, Boston.

  • PrideOfCanada

    Alicia Fox was channeling Sid there.

    “GOLDBERG!! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY CAR?!! GOLDBERRRRRRRG!!!”

  • Mr. Money On The Table

    ….Is wrestling still on?

  • PrideOfCanada

    This Gallagher/Daivari feud is wonderful.

  • PrideOfCanada

    Daivari: “I have a family name I need to live up to!”

    Difficult task, that one.

    • Ripner Cabbit

      Let me know when he chokes out a hijacker.

  • Ripner Cabbit

    Alicia Fox is no Miz . . .

  • ziggaman730

    NXT as the best promotion in 2016???? C’mon BOD NXT sucked this year. SD should of won.

    • Ripner Cabbit

      I wouldn’t say it sucked, it wasn’t TNA or Raw or anything, but yea SD or NJPW (Although not sure people were voting as if Raw/SD were separate or together as WWE.

      • Daniel O’Reilly

        I don’t see why NJPW didn’t win.

        • Stranger In the Alps

          Not enough tapes being traded.

    • Matt_Indeed.

      Should HAVE won.

      Should HAVE.

  • Roronoa FunkDoc

    It’s not really a 80s/90s porno unless the soundtrack has a Sade knockoff

  • Marvkie Post – #10

    So apparently this POTY thing is just a bauble Brian and I trade back and forth. Seems reasonable.

    • Kenny_Reigns

      The difference is Brian deserves it.

      • Marvkie Post – #10

        BOOOOOOOO

      • Marvkie Post – #10

        Bahaha

  • Ripner Cabbit

    I <3 Gallagher

  • Andrew Champagne

    There was so much “meh” in the 2011 Rumble, but Santino’s bit at the end was pretty awesome. Call the whole thing **1/2.

    • Vintage

      They really, really, really should have just put Santino over.

  • Matthew Maynard Adams

    Man, windy as fuck here, Like 50mph, broken branches all over the place and shit, had to walk sideways to make myself more aerodynamic. But it’s in the mid-40s, I’ll take this this over that 5 degree -10 wind chill bullshit any day of the the week.

    Anyhoo, for any soccer fans here, which I guess means Marv because the Brits are in bed: I saw on the ESPN tracker that a player got sold for like $28 million. Is that how it works in soccer, instead of having trades teams just sell contracts to each other? I mean, soccer doesn’t even have a draft that you can use to trade picks with, right?

    • Napoleon Blownapart

      Pretty much, yes.

      • Matthew Maynard Adams

        ESPN might want to think about wording it a little better. It said some soccer team sold some player for $28M to some other soccer team. You can’t sell people! “Sold his rights”, “Sold his contract”, something.

        Doing that in American sports is completely against the rules, and wouldn’t be a good idea in most cases anyway. If anything, and this is most prevalent in baseball, you pay other teams to take your players.

    • Ripner Cabbit

      Yep and they usually sign players when they are in their early teens to play on the youth teams the team runs.

  • Biff ♥ You

    Becky’s hair can’t get much redder.

  • Daniel O’Reilly

    The BoD needs a backup Slack or Discord channel, or something.

  • Biff ♥ You

    “Don’t interrupt me, I’m the champion!”

    Your stock is rising, Alexa Bliss.

  • LScisco

    World Cup is expanding? What a joke.

    • Aaron

      If there’s one group we can trust to promote the game for its own good and not money, it’s FIFA.

    • Macklin Man Without Password

      I heard it’s gonna make them an extra $1 Billion. Yeah, I’d whore out the sport for that much loot too.

    • Napoleon Blownapart

      Probably won’t happen till the 2026 edition but yes it’s a huge mistake.

    • Vintage

      Oh man, and who’s just waiting for President Trump to sell some U.S. city down the river by bringing that circus here?

  • Ripner Cabbit

    No DBry =;_:=

    • aboynamedart

      Go fig, Shane isn’t too bad thus far. Great face-off with Bex and Bliss.

  • Biff ♥ You

    “If there’s no tension, there’s nothing at stake.”

    Shane McMahon with the quiet truth.

  • Experienced Monster

    Goddamit, Talking Smack is making me care about and actually like Mojo Rawley.

  • Andrew Champagne

    On to 2012. Oh, the days when Alex Riley was a relevant wrestler.

  • maskedcabana

    Mojo comes off as super likeable when he’s dialed down.

  • Biff ♥ You

    This interview is doing the impossible: it’s humanizing Mojo Rawley and making him into a sympathetic character. And for fuck’s sake, he’s explaining the psychology behind his persona — it pissed off Zack and helped him channel frustrating into matches.

    Wonders never cease.

    • chicagodem79

      Talking Smack is unbelievably awesome for these guys, it’s literally a perfect complement to Smackdown. The extra time to build their characters on this show is invaluable.

  • Napoleon Blownapart

    “*maybe* we *eventually* kinda can” is probably closer to the truth than “yes we can “

    • Marvkie Post – #10

      Hammering people over the head with what they’re *allowed* to think is always going to have a backlash.

      • Matthew Maynard Adams

        As it should.

        • Marvkie Post – #10

          Getting people publicly fired for saying things the left doesn’t like for eight years straight eventually HAD to end with people latching onto a guy that made a career of saying things the left doesn’t like.

          • Matthew Maynard Adams

            It didn’t help.

  • Matthew Maynard Adams

    While I think soccer is a boring and stupid sport, I gotta admit, as someone who only knows about American sports, the economics of it all are quite fascinating. And I will say the TV presentation is top-notch, especially the commentators, and you know you’re done in under 2 hours. That game last night took WAY too fucking long. There were 31 Manias shorter than that, almost 32.

    • Napoleon Blownapart

      Read “soccernomics” whenever you have the time. It’s a comprehensive look at the business side of the sport.

      • Matthew Maynard Adams

        I’ll check it out if I get the chance.

    • Macklin Man Without Password

      I love the pace of soccer. You’re in and out in 2 hours counting half time. Unless it’s a big game then you may have extra time and penalties but that’s reserved for big matches.

      One thing I’m not crazy about is the perceived lack of exactness when it comes to Stoppage time. They don’t stop the clock when someone is injured so at the end they throw more time on. I know someone is keeping track but it always feel haphazard like “hmm he writhed on the ground for about a minute, then another guy went down for 2 minutes approximately, then a fan ran on the pitch. Call it 4 minutes!”

      • Marvkie Post – #10

        That I think is the hardest thing for Americans to wrap their heads around (and for good reason it makes no sense.) You mean when the countdown ends the game…keeps going…? That doesn’t even…

        • Matthew Maynard Adams

          It’s not right to not have a buzzer beater or a walk off or something.

          But I was thinking about how it could help fix games. I guess it really wouldn’t, but I was thinking of the 72 Olympic basketball team.

      • Matthew Maynard Adams

        Yeah, they don’t ever stop the clock, do they? That whole thing seems off to me.

        The NHL is good about this too, usually* you’re talking 3 hours under the worse case scenario.

        *Unless it’s a playoff game.

        • Macklin Man Without Password

          Yeah the clock never stops. Not for injury, not for pitch invasion, not for Stoppage of play for any reason. It’s still tough getting used to when you get to the end of the 90 minutes having them randomly say “Okay 4 more minutes now”

      • chicagodem79

        If they had either a box on the side once they determine how much extra time there should be right after it happens, I think that solves the problem a little bit. Rather than the word coming from the officials randomly in minute 85 of the match, you’ll always know. I think that transparency would help.

  • Biff ♥ You

    This is the weirdest promo from Ziggler ever. It’s like a heel promo from a babyface.

  • Biff ♥ You

    The Trump Golden Showers jokes have already jumped the shark.

    • Jackson Smith

      Not even cloooooooose

      • cultstatus

        Make Water Sports Great Again

  • Jackson Smith

    Trump would like to ask you a question – what’s the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea?

    • He never had a garbanzo bean on his face?

      • Jackson Smith

        You got it, LOL

    • Jackson Smith

      He’s never had a garbanzo bean on his face.

    • Matthew Maynard Adams

      I know the answer to this!

  • cultstatus

    It feels like a ton of wrestlers went from being pretty good or great in 1998 to being bad in 1999. First off the top of my head is Bam Bam Bigelow. He was awesome in ECW in 98, then sucked when he went to WCW in 1999.

  • Let’s be grateful Trump doesn’t like the Golden Nugget.

    • Jackson Smith

      How incredibly angry Trump is right now must be something else.

  • Curtis Williams

    Ziggler is dwarfing Kalisto. Isn’t he 6’2?

  • Marvkie Post – #10

    Watching the 80s and I’m not sure there’s a more tragic story of that decade than Ryan White’s. They’re showing parent/teacher meetings with parents being terrified of their kids getting AIDS from playing with him in school. That’s easy to look back on now and be embarrassed by but, like, in that moment I totally understand these people being scared.

    • Curtis Williams

      Is that kid a big deal because he was kid that had AIDS or because he was a kid with AIDS that Michael Jackson befriended?

      • Marvkie Post – #10

        Well, it’s a CNN show so they don’t mention the Michael Jackson thing at all and pretend that his story immediately changed everyone’s mind including Reagan’s lol

    • RudoWakening

      I lived in small town Ohio when the White story broke. People were FLIPPING THE FUCK OUT because shit, man, we still didn’t really know shit about AIDS

      • Which led to one of the funniest yet saddest bits of footage ever, the NBA All-Star Game after Magic Johnson’s diagnosis where everyone is terrified to even get within ten feet of him to guard him.

  • Curtis Williams

    When was the last time there was a chair shot to the head in WWE

    • WrestleMania 27, HHH and the Undertaker. I forget who did it but they were both nominally fined.

  • Obama, you’re out!

    Trump, urine!

    • Marvkie Post – #10

      Who wrote this first?

  • Matthew Maynard Adams

    If J. Billington Bullworth was a real person I’d vote for him. He’s like Trump’s cool older brother.

    • Nick Demola

      I almost want to adopt that character and run for local office. Seriously.

      • Matthew Maynard Adams

        You’d have to tone it down it bit, but the basic idea? It could work.

        • Nick Demola

          I found out how corrupt the system was when I ran for local office this past June. Literally being told by everyone that if you don’t blow everyone and promise everything to everyone, they’ll kill your campaign. And they did because I didn’t play ball. And don’t get me started with what I see from state and federal legislators at my day job. It’s worse than the public things. By a mile.

          It’d kill my current career, and I’m doing some good, so that’d be tough… but shit, it’s so frustrating.

          • Matthew Maynard Adams

            Wait, you, really are serious?

  • Curtis Williams

    I know this is leading to Randy turning on Bray, but I kind of wish they’d keep this pairing together

    • Dwayne

      Randy fits in

  • Facts

    Someone had a Police as pigs painting in the US Capitol. Im sure that will help matters.

    • Biff ♥ You

      I miss the days when everyone hated the Police equally.

      Fuck you, Sting.

    • Aaron

      Everyone has chosen their side.

  • cultstatus

    Jesus Christ, Joel Gertner’s intro at Heatwave 98 is a fucking work of art.

  • Facts

    First off the ground is made of soft copy paper and the kids are going through my email

  • I may or may not have dropped the word “Marvspin” at work tonight.

  • Vintage

    How the fuck did I miss this Rusev tweet from last night?

    https://twitter.com/RusevBUL/status/818683482738225153

    Goddammit, give him ALL THE BELTS!!!

  • Andrew Champagne

    2012 Rumble is a lot of “okay, but not great,” although the extended Jericho-Sheamus sequence at the end is pretty fun. ***1/4

    • Didn’t Ricardo come out in a busted car as a homage to Del Rio’s entrance?

      • Andrew Champagne

        Yeah, others liked that more than I did. It was OK; as comedy spots go, anything Santino did destroyed that.

  • Marvkie Post – #10

    There are a few protests in our history that hit every perfect beat in ways that make the message inescapable, AIDS protestors covering the National Mall with a quilt is one of them.

    • People like their protests to be warm and comfortable.

      • Marvkie Post – #10

        I don’t mean it like that, I”m not trying to judge. I’m just saying some have a concept behind them that come across more powerful than others. That quilt was one of these, where just the idea of covering the Mall with a quilt was something no one could ignore. It was brilliant.

        I’d put the Vietnam vets throwing their own medals over the White House fence in 1971 in the same class. Like…that’s not a message anyone can ignore. It’s too strong. And most especially, too obvious.

        • No, I generally agree with you, there’s a way to get a cogent point across without camping out and blocking traffic or waving around the biggest, blackest megaphone or otherwise annoying people.

          • RedStorm

            There’s also a difference between someone saying “alright we’ll give you what you want, just stop” and “thank you for bringing this to our attention, now let’s have a dialogue”.

    • Night

      Even malls need protection.

    • Nick Demola

      The Bus Boycott in Alabama worked well too.

    • RudoWakening

      That mall doesn’t even have a Sbarro’s

  • I can’t tell if this place is dead or if Disqus is being brokedick.

    • Mr. Money On The Table

      Prolly both.

    • Marvkie Post – #10

      Lol, I think a bit of both. I’m hitting the hay man, have a good one

    • Matthew Maynard Adams

      One causes the other.

  • Yeehaw

    Got stood up by this hot broad earlier today. So I go to the bar and see this one chick I’ve been trying to bang out with some douche bag bro. To quote Barney Stinson, I can still make this night legendary!

  • cultstatus

    Heatwave 98 is a great show. So of course Scott trashes it.

    • Yeehaw

      Which one is that? Like the highlights.

      • aboynamedart

        RVD & Sabu vs Hayabusa & Hakushi, the main was Bubba/D-Von/Big Dick Dudley v. Spike/Dreamer/Sandman to payoff Beulah being retired.

        • Yeehaw

          Ohhh yeah. That’s pretty decent. I think Hardcore Heaven 00 (?) The one with Ballz/Tanaka and Tajiri/Corino is an outstanding event that doesn’t get enough credit.

    • PeteF3

      It’s OK. Better than some ECW PPVs, worse than others.

  • Mr. Money On The Table

    I really wish I had pizza.

    • I don’t know where the nearest Sbarro is.

    • Napoleon Blownapart

      Nothings stopping you.

      • Mr. Money On The Table

        General laziness.

  • Mr. Money On The Table

    I feel like watching random shit wrestling.

    • How shitty?

      • Mr. Money On The Table

        I dunno yet. Not as shitty as you would think. I may just end up being a random episode of Wrestling Challenge, it might be some sort of Pro Wrestling USA.

      • Mr. Money On The Table

        I have decided to start with this. One of my favorite matches in terms of pure shit.

        https://youtu.be/7EPTiRVPAZI

        • THAT’S NOT A MOVE. THAT’S NOT EVEN A MOVE.

          • Mr. Money On The Table

            I love when the furry boot dude tried to get into the ring by hopping up on the top rope and eats shit and they tear him a new asshole.

          • AND HE REPEATS THE FUCKING SPOT LIKE A GOOBER.

          • Mr. Money On The Table

            There are so many glorious awful trainwrecks on that show.

          • I’m currently enjoying “Fake Matt Hardy Beats Up Two Backyard Guys”.

    • Napoleon Blownapart

      Just watch Raw.

    • Biff ♥ You

      1993 WCW is for you!

  • Napoleon Blownapart

    Apparently the punishment for armed robbery in Sudan is crucifixion.

  • P.K.

    Yup…

  • Curtis Williams

    Watching Tom Hardy’s new show right now. Kind of boring, hope it picks up.

  • Holy shit this is hilariously bad.

  • Napoleon Blownapart

    Man, fuck prions.

  • RedStorm

    Grayson Allen sure did learn his lesson. For one game. Because in his second game back he tried to kick someone in the nuts and in his third game back he shoved an opposing coach.

    • Someone’s gonna eventually lose their shit and blast him in the face and America will have a new hero.

      • RedStorm

        I’m just surprised it hasn’t happened already. It’s also interesting that most of (if not all) his tripping incidents are on white dudes.

        • That’s what makes it funnier, watch it be some equally scrawny-looking white dude from fucking Boston College that stomps his ass.

          • RedStorm

            Some pasty corner 3-point specialist from Bucknell will turn into Kermit Washington in the NCAA Tournament when Allen throws a Rockette kick his way.

          • Aaron

            America needs a hero.

          • RedStorm

            The hero we both need and deserve.

          • This is where I reiterate that it sucks Duke doesn’t play Maryland anymore. The crowd there would probably will someone to do it and that dude would get a standing ovation.

          • RedStorm

            Speaking of Maryland, they need to learn to move around and not play “stand around and see what Melo Trimble can do”. That game today was rough.

        • ARRRRGH THE BARBARIAN

          Well then you get a lecture from his smug coach, who should be tripped so he knows how it feels.

          • RedStorm

            He only lectures the opposing black players. He wouldn’t dare speak down to the whites.

          • RedStorm

            Also, I can’t believe he pulled that pussy-ass “back surgery” card when he knew the team would struggle in the loaded ACC. 1995 all over again.

  • Mr. Money On The Table

    You know what basketball defense isn’t utilized enough? When the player goes to dunk or shoot the ball, pants ’em.

    • RedStorm

      That’s because it’s a technical or flagrant, depending on the level of play.

      • Mr. Money On The Table

        Eh, but it would work the one time.

        • RedStorm

          I think it should be accepted as defense. You don’t like it? Tie your pants tighter.

  • Mr. Money On The Table

    World Famous Flea Market may be my favorite Wrestling show on the air today.

    • I gotta say, this was a good pull on your part.

  • This dude shamelessly and entirely ripped off Shawn Michaels. And he didn’t even make a quarter-assed attempt to disguise it.

    • Mr. Money On The Table

      Hickenbottom?

      • Yes.

        • Mr. Money On The Table

          Fuck that dude. He looks like Budnik and HBK had a baby and then peed on it.

          • I like that they’re using a Little Giant ladder. I remember the infomercials for those.

          • Mr. Money On The Table

            You gotta go with what you can find in the VFW.

          • Mr. Money On The Table

            Or in the back of the truck.

    • Aaron

      Hopefully his promos are better.

  • Matthew Maynard Adams

    I ran into this chick I used to work with like 8 years ago. Like, the Evil Bosses’ daughter.

    I SO wanted to tell her to fuck off, but she ran up and gave me a hug and I said fuck it, let the past be the past. I mean, I’ll shoot her dad on site, but if you’re nice to me I’ll be nice to you, never mind past history.

  • Mr. Money On The Table

    https://youtu.be/xNpUED3_Ouk

    This is prolly my favorite backyard match of all time.

    • LOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLL JEEZUS. Holy shit, this is fucking tremendous.

      The Sin Cara kid is actually GOOD. And the Big Show might be actually factually retarded.

      • aboynamedart

        I was afraid to click for a sec but holy shit, you’re not wrong about Sin Cara.

        • RIGHT? Like, he’s actually got some legitimate potential.

  • Big. Daddy.

    • Mr. Money On The Table

      Is that the one where they’re watching British shit?

      • Yup. Tiny-ass ring, and LOTS of shoulder blocks.

        • Mr. Money On The Table

          You gotta find the one with Uncle Pencil and Billy Down Syndrome. That one is good. The Blind Guy Watching Two Fat Dudes one is good too.

          • Oh, this might be my new go-to drunk 4 am entertainment. Or maybe my new dead time at work entertainment. Or both.

  • Napoleon Blownapart

    Drugs are bad. Drug cartels are worse.

  • Marvkie Post – #10

    Alright well that was a good two hours of sleep, now I’m running through 80s music videos looking for potential Marv names lol

    • Terrence Trent M’Arvy.

      • Marvkie Post – #10

        No idea who that is, they have to be famous and recognizable enough. I think tomorrow might be Marvissey

        • …and lo, the master reminded the student of his place.

          • Marvkie Post – #10

            I have a huge list of names already that my wife refers to as “Exhibit A” lol

    • Curtis Williams

      There’s probably something you could do with George Michael.

    • JimbobJones

      How about Marvdonna?

    • JimbobJones

      Aerosmarv? Marvley Crue?

  • Curtis Williams

    MTV Classic is informing that Puff Daddy used Kashmir as an instrumental

    • Marvkie Post – #10

      I’m watching The 80s right now and they’re talking about how MTV had to be legit blackmailed by CBS threatening to pull all of their artists to force them to finally play a video by some scrub named uh, shit was what it…Michael Jackson.

      • Curtis Williams

        Which is funny considering they refused to front him and Landis the money needed to make that one video….I think it was called Thriller

  • Biff ♥ You

    Per Da Meltz: Undertaker v. Braun Strowman is close to being penciled in for WrestleMania.

    • Marvkie Post – #10

      Oh dear lol

    • Curtis Williams

      Can it be un-penciled?

    • JimbobJones

      They seriously want us to remember Giant Gonzalez like Shawn Michaels, don’t they?

  • Mr. Money On The Table

    Now is the part of the show where I have what I believe is now my seventh Wild Cherry Life Saver and then sleep. We learned things today. About life and each other. Maybe? I dunno, I was at work most of the day, but still..times were had by all so yeah….Bye everybody.

    *Pulls down the hatch so the scooter can come out of its hiding place and then walks out the front door and down the street.*

    • Dude, we have a match tomorrow, set your alarm or something.

      • Mr. Money On The Table

        What is it? Wednesday!? Yeah. Should be fine. I don’t think I am going somewhere after work or anything.

        • If we beat the Fat Otters, we both get into the Rumble. So…there’s stakes, I suppose.

  • Curtis Williams

    Run DMC was considered Rock? Wut

  • I fell down a rabbit hole at work earlier and ended up reading the Wikipedia article about U.S. Marine Corps training. I know it was probably polished a bit, but I have no idea how people volunteer for that.

    • Marvkie Post – #10

      Because it’s fun!

        • Marvkie Post – #10

          The trick to really avoid the Drill Instructors being total cocks was, like anything else really, to be in the very middle of the pack. Don’t be first place and don’t be last haha

          I loved boot camp it was one of the more interesting experiences of my life

          • Y’know how I know you were legitimately a Marine? You called them a Drill INSTRUCTOR.

          • Marvkie Post – #10

            Oh call them a Drill Sergeant and your ass is doing mountain climbers for the next 30 minutes for sure lol

          • One of my best friends is in the Army, and I used to spam the shit out of him with questions about it when he was home and we got to hang out, and I used the term “Drill Instructor” and he IMMEDIATELY cut me off with “NO, THEY’RE CALLED DRILL SERGEANTS FOR US. THE MARINES HAVE DRILL INSTRUCTORS. THOSE GUYS ARE MESSED UP.”

          • Marvkie Post – #10

            Oh they’re all very frightening men, certainly. Especially the short guys, those guys were angry as hell. Like they’d do a four mile run with you but they’d do the entire thing running backward screaming at the TOP of their lungs and would never drop a bead of sweat. They were robots.

            I was lucky in that I went to MCRD in San Diego so it was all men. At Paris Island they train all the female Marines and therefore have female Drill Instructors which I always figured would be a lot more difficult just because you’d have to consciously think “Do I say aye aye ma’am or aye aye sir?” That half second of consideration could lead to real trouble.

          • YOU HOLLYWOOD MARINE.

            The most horrifying training footage I’ve ever seen was while I was watching a documentary on YouTube about the French Foreign Legion. They were training in fucking nasty-ass jungle in French Guiana, and the guy leading the training NEVER yelled at them. He kept a calm voice. He wasn’t nice, but he wasn’t yelling and being a dickwad and freaking people out. Just, straightforward, calm, measured.

            So they cut to a clip back in his office and the director says, “I’ve never seen anyone else teach like that, you don’t yell, you don’t scream or anything, why is that?” and the French Drill Sergeant guy smiles and says “If the training is hard enough, it will do your screaming for you”.

          • Marvkie Post – #10

            He could have just been the nice guy too. When I was there each platoon had three Drill Instructors and they all had very defined roles. One was the nice fatherly guy that would listen if people were freaking out and generally just be an approachable type, he was usually the Chief Drill Instructor (I want to type DI but it’s ingrained not to lol) then there’d be the other two, one being the bulldog that would always get in your face no matter how well or terribly you did and the lead training guy that was half a dick but also mostly there to actually teach the drilling.

            My first night at MCRD my bulldog shoved a sock all the way down my throat. I guess he figured out immediately that I was a talker lol

          • YOUR FIRST NIGHT? GODDAMN, THEY REALLY DON’T WASTE ANY TIME.

          • Marvkie Post – #10

            Well that was the first night in the platoon. The real first night is when they do the yellow footprints and all that then they process you and give you all your gear and take all your clothes and personal effects and you spend a night or two in a different set of barracks that are much more laid back.

            But yeah, the “first” night. I remember very clearly we were all standing at the end of our racks in flip flops and tighty whities while they did inspection and the bulldog (Staff Sgt. Geary) came by and started screaming in my face and I still didn’t quite understand the third person thing and I said, “This recruit would like to respond but he’s not sure what to call you.” And he replied, “YOU?! Did you just call me YOU and not Drill Instructor?!” And then he grabbed one of my socks out of footlocker and crammed it down my throat while I stood there mostly naked and choking hahaha. It was very clear this was a place where my gibberish wasn’t going to save me. I needed that.

          • If you don’t mind me asking, how long were you in the Corps?

          • Marvkie Post – #10

            Just shy of two years. I got an honorable discharge but it wasn’t without some negotiation. The funny thing is that boot camp was the easy part. It was like what I imagine jail to be. You don’t really have a choice but to follow their rules because there’s no other option. You’re not leaving. They will catch you lol

            It was when I got out and I had to live a normal life outside but STILL obey these bizarre rules where things got messy. I think that’s why they always go for kids right out of school, they don’t know what regular life with a job is like so they don’t really know the difference. I was a bit older so I already knew what life on my own was like and that wasn’t it.

          • Oddly enough, I feel that if I’d gone to college at 28 instead of 18, I would’ve had a way better chance of not bombing out of it spectacularly.

          • Marvkie Post – #10

            It’s very different for sure, I’m getting ready to go back right now and this go around with school is definitely very different because I’m doing what I feel like I want to do rather than, in what I thought at the time anyway, was meant to do.

            Journalism took me on to some weird paths man. I mean that was the only reason I ever joined up anyway. I wanted to be the anti-war liberal embedded in the Marine Corps lol

          • I went to college with dreams of becoming a RESPECTED SPORTSWRITER. At best, I would’ve been dropkicked into a dead industry with a mountain of debt. As bummed out as I was by how college turned out for me, it might very well have been a tactical loss that turned into a strategic win.

          • Marvkie Post – #10

            Over time, yeah probably. I mean even if you had become the most famous sportswriter ever you still never would have been respected. Not by anyone in your own industry at least.

          • Oh, Bones has told me some horror stories of being a sportswriter for a small local paper. He’s confirmed some of those suspicions lol.

          • Marvkie Post – #10

            If I was going to write sports anywhere I’d want to do it in a small town. At least there’s some amount of need for what you’re doing because the results of John Keester Catholic School’s most recent JV basketball game is probably not going to be immediately available on the internet.

          • Marvkie Post – #10

            Anyway bud I’m going to go give this sleep thing another try, four hours until the wife’s alarm goes off

          • Bon soir, chief.

  • Biff ♥ You

    On the upshot, Strowman/Taker probably won’t be for the title (lol if it is). It also means that AJ Styles has a higher likelihood of competing for the WWE Title, which is good. On the downshot, Cena/Undertaker probably doesn’t happen, which is kind of sad. It shouldn’t have been for the title, but Cena/UT in a non-title match would’ve been good to see.

    • Napoleon Blownapart

      It definitely makes the rumble match more intriguing.

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