In the world of professional wrestling, there are shows, there are events, there are special events, and then there’s … THE MAIN EVENT! We have a genuinely stacked show tonight; where both the Barbarian and Cactus Jack get to seek a little redemption against Harley Race’s gang o’ scumbags, and Erik Watts sees his first action since his arrest.
JIM ROSS and MICHAEL P.S. HAYES are your hosts, coming to you LIVE in front of a Green Screen. Superbrawl III, hype hype hype.
RON SIMMONS vs. TONY ATLAS
Michael Hayes leaves the commentary booth, following what I like to believe was a fairly ugly confrontation with Dok Hendrix, leaving JR alone to call this one. Atlas runs over Simmons with a bunch of shoulderblocks, and then delivers a big splash while Ron’s lying on his side, which probably didn’t feel particularly good to either guy. Simmons comes back with a pair of shoulderblocks of his own, and Atlas takes a nose-full of powder. Back in, Atlas poses like a special needs jungle cat, and Simmons shoots a look to the crowd that clearly gives the message of “dah fock is wrong with that man?” A test of strength follows, and Atlas CHEATS by kicking Ron in the gut. That just serves to piss Simmons off, and he suplexes Atlas clear across the ring. A shoulderblock misses, and Simmons hits the buckle. JR’s quick to play up that Simmons actually needs surgery on the shoulder, and Atlas is all over it, laying more damage to his rotator cuff than Mark Prior’s delivery. Still, Simmons is able to come back with a powerslam, and he scores a quick win at 6:11. Simmons would have been far better served to just squash jobbers for awhile, instead of having Tony Atlas ploddingly kick his ass before pulling out the “upset”. It’s a perilous time for Ron, following his title loss, and he needs a series of strong wins to keep his credibility strong. 1/2*
JR announces that Watts’ suspension has been lifted after the review of the video footage that proved Erik’s innocence. Dude – he was making out with underage children, he needs to serve some serious time!
ERIK WATTS vs. RIP ROGERS
Rogers is basically Ricky Morton with Vince Russo’s beard. It’s utterly terrifying, I assure you. And speaking of terrifying, Watts applies a “hammerlock”. Rogers pokes Watts in the eyes, but Watts has no idea how to sell, so he sunset flips Rogers for 2. A flying forearm smash sets up the STF, and Watts is your winner at 3:40. DUD
THE WRECKING CREW vs. TOMMY ANGEL and TERRY BRONSON
Yep, we’re still pushing these goons, despite having 2 clear weeks of data to prove that they are atrocious. JR talked to Angel and Bronson before the show, and allegedly, they feel they can “compete” in WCW. And, to be fair, they are absolutely competing here, and getting totally destroyed. Bronson throws some desperate dropkicks, but they go nowhere, and the big ugly bad guys go back to kicking his ass. Fury delivers a DDT to Angel, but refuses to pin him because he’s either cocky, or brain damaged. In fact, they start tagging in and out without actually performing any moves, so draw your conclusions appropriately. Bronson gets the hot tag, which he uses to … run back and forth across the ring. I wish I was kidding, but he literally runs the ropes 6 consecutive times while the big guys wait to deliver the Wrecking Ball at 4:46. I’m going to assume Bronson’s only had one day of professional training to date, and has only learned how to run the ropes. 1/2*
THE BARBARIAN and CACTUS JACK vs. PAUL ORNDORFF and VADER (with Harley Race)
Yep – you done messed with the Barbarian, and now it’s time to pay the price. Vader asks “WHO’S DA MAN” repeatedly, which I assume is total rhetoric with Barbarian standing right there. Da Man starts with Orndorff, and he overpowers Mr. Wonderful to assert his dominance. The referee then holds him back, presumably to prevent Orndorff’s head from being popped off like a chicken, and Paul gets in a cheap shot. That just gets him a boot to the mouth, and Jack tags in. Orndorff chokes him out in the corner, which I’m fairly sure is foreplay in Jack’s world. In comes Vader, and he punches Mick in the ear and face repeatedly, but Cactus manages to throw up a foot to kick Vader in the face, and a forearm takes him down for 2. I love Vader’s selling, that anytime you can get in a big unexpected blow, he makes the Bald Bull face, and stands there completely stunned.
The pair brawl to the floor, and Harley takes liberties, holding Cactus hostage. However, Jack’s able to wiggle away at the last second, and the old man eats the clothesline. Barbarian tags in now, and he just feeds it to Vader. Vader gives it back, swiping those meaty palms back and forth, but Barbarian stands his ground. Orndorff comes in, choking Barbarian out. Barbarian stands up quickly, but a high knee takes him down. Barbarian powers out of the pinfall by launching Wonderful into orbit, and the Kick of Fear is delivered with some muster! Vader stops any pinfall attempt and dumps Barbarian, leaving Jack alone. Race holds him hostage against the ropes, but Jack wiggles loose again and Vader splashes his manger! Jack then takes the shocked Vader to the floor with a Cactus clothesline, and when Wonderful dives over the top to go after Barbarian, the referee has enough and throws this out at 5:58. As the double DQ is declared, Vader smashes Jack with a hard plastic chair; the non-folding type you probably had in your auditorium in school, over the head, full force. Barbarian rushes in, so Vader avalanches the pair of them against the guardrail, and leaves celebrating his destruction of the duo. Fantastic hard-hitting brawl, that needed at least 10 more minutes. ***
MICHAEL HAYES heads down to ringside to chat with Jack and Barbarian. Cactus is furious that nothing got done. He normally fights to hurt people, or profit, but this one’s pride. So, he demands a rematch between all 4, and this time, he wants no disqualification.
There’s no Main Event for the next 2 weeks, so JR hopes to see the match signed on the Power Hour this coming weekend. And, looking past Sting’s challenge at Superbrawl, they’ve got Jack lined up perfectly as a formidable, legitimate threat to the belt.