Impact Wrestling – June 24, 2015

Impact
Wrestling
Date:
June 24, 2015
Location:
Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators:
Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero
Tonight
is the go home show for Slammiversary, but it’s also a special
live(ish) episode which has been built up as a big deal. However,
there’s also the major show next week with the World Title showdown
between champion Kurt Angle and the undefeated Ethan Carter III.
It’s not really clear which of these are the biggest or which is
going to take a backseat to the others. Let’s get to it.

Ethan
Carter III and Tyrus arrive and have a great idea in mind for Kurt
Angle’s surprise opponent.
We
recap last week with Full Metal Mayhem being announced for tonight.
Here’s
World Champion Kurt Angle with something to say. Carter’s road to
the title stops next week, so why doesn’t he just bring out the
mystery opponent right now. This brings out Carter and Tyrus with
the former saying Angle looks like it’s going to take an army of
10,000 men to drag him off his mountain. However, it’s going to take
one and guess who that one is going to be. Angle cuts him off and
says two things are going to happen: Carter is going to tap next week
and the mystery opponent is going to tap tonight.
Carter:
“Tap-a-roo Kurt!” Ethan lists off all the people he’s defeated
and knows he can beat anyone. “Bring forth your heroes and I will
sacrifice them on my altar of perfection.” Angle says no one can
help Carter next week because he’s tapping out next week. Carter
teases coming to the ring but instead introduces the mystery
opponent: MATT HARDY! Yeah that Matt Hardy. It really doesn’t make
it any bigger of a deal when you think about it extra.
X-Division
Title: Tigre Uno vs. Low Ki vs. Grado
Tournament
final so the title is vacant coming in. Low Ki slaps Grado in the
face to start but Grado comes back with some snap jabs, only to get
chopped back down. Tigre gets back in and is knocked down just as
fast but Grado takes too much time going up top, allowing Low Ki to
shove him down and hit Warrior’s Way for….an elimination at 2:24.
That’s the first mention of this not being one fall to a finish.
Tigre gets a quick two off a rollup but Ki kicks him down. Ki gets
crotched on top though and a Phoenix Splash gives Tigre the title at
5:11 total.
Rating:
C-. I feel sorry for the
X-Division guys because they’re stuck with these five minute matches
and no time to ever develop anything but it’s supposed to be this big
deal. Tigre Uno is just another guy holding the title for a
meaningless reign before the main eventers take over around
Destination X time next year.
Bram
takes over an interview and again
calls out any former members
of the roster. He leaves
and someone with a big glove grabs JB’s shoulder. JB: “It’s time!”
Taryn
Terrell yells at Marti and Jade for not taking care of Kong and
Brooke last week. This Sunday, it’s a 3-2 handicap match, because
why have a title match when you can have a match that belongs on any
given episode of TV?
We
run down the Slammiversary card: James Storm vs. Magnus, Jesse
Godderz vs. Robbie E., Lashley/Mr. Anderson vs. Tyrus/Ethan Carter
III. That’s all we have so far, plus the aforementioned handicap
match.
Velvet
Sky vs. Angelina Love
If
Velvet wins, she’s back on the roster full time. Sky takes her down
to start and throws Love to the floor for a whip into the post. Back
in and Angelina pulls her off the middle rope and hits Lights Out for
two, setting off a lot of screaming at the referee. A Stunner plants
Love for the pin out of nowhere at 5:24.
Rating:
D. Yay. I mean that with full
sincerity. I’m so glad that a Knockout who was nothing above average
on her best day in the ring is back to take a spot and some of the
spotlight away from the awesome Dollhouse act. Sky and Love stopped
being interesting a few years ago when it was clear that nearly every
story they were ever involved with was about the Beautiful People.
Boring match here and the ending does nothing to me.
The
Dirty Heels don’t remember learning about tables, ladders and chairs
in wrestling camp, but think the dirtier things get, the better their
chances.
Another
playtime is over vignette.
MVP
is back and rips on internet journalists. The war with the Rising is
still on. It should be noted that these backstage segments are being
shot with a really bad camera, which makes everything look like it’s
about half a second slower than it should be.
Dirty
Heels vs. Wolves
Full
Metal Mayhem, meaning TLC but with pins. If the Wolves win they’re
champions, but if the Heels win then there’s one more match. The
Heels (Austin Aries/Bobby Roode) throw the weapons out before the
Wolves (Eddie Edwards/Davey Richards) come to the ring. It’s a brawl
to start and all four get chairs, with the Wolves knocking the Heels’
chairs out of their hands to send them back to the floor. Aries and
Roode take a breather on the floor but are smart enough to raise a
ladder to stop a double suicide dive.
We
take a break and come back with the Heels in control and taking in
seat in some chairs for stereo chinlocks. The Wolves fight up and
bring in some weapons to clean house. They knock the Heels to the
floor for three straight suicide dives before a trashcan lid
shot/falcon’s arrow gets two on Roode. Davey wraps a chain around
his boot but gets caught in the Last Chancery, only to have Edwards
make a save.
Back
up and a missile dropkick/powerbomb combination puts Edwards through
a table for two. The Wolves toss into a kick (with the chain over
the boot) gets a very close two but Aries gets caught inside a
trashcan for chair shots and a double dropkick from the top. The
Wolves load up Aries, still in the trashcan, for a powerbomb but
Roode low blows Eddie to put Aries on top for the pin at 18:13.
Rating:
B. I don’t care. That’s the
problem with this series: it feels like they’re trying to copy the
awesome three way tag team series last year but the matches really
aren’t all that great. They’re just going through the motions and
having decent matches, but there’s nothing that makes me want to
watch them fight five times.
Matt
Hardy doesn’t think much of Ethan Carter III and doesn’t explain why
he agreed to fight for him tonight. Carter comes up and says if
Hardy wants a title shot, he needs to kiss the ring. Hardy asks what
happens if Carter loses next week.
And
now, here are Jeff Jarrett and Karen Jarrett of Global Force
Wrestling. Jeff says he’s shocked that he’s here too. A week ago,
he got a message from TNA management, who asked him to come back for
a match. He almost hung up there because he doesn’t even wrestle for
his own promotion. However, they said it was his own match: the King
of the Mountain match at
Slammiversary.
It
brought back a lot of memories for him, such as Kurt Angle jumping to
TNA and Samoa Joe headbutting Angle and busting him open and a punk
kid from north Georgia named AJ Styles becoming the greatest wrestler
this company ever had. Or a team called Beer Money becoming the best
team this company ever produced and Eric Young having more TV shows
than Ryan Seacrest.
Over
the last fourteen months, Jarrett has spent all his time building up
Global Force Wrestling, but he started thinking about what his wife
would think about all this. Karen talks about all the time and
effort they’ve put into Global Force Wrestling, which is now their
life. But then Jeff started talking about all his memories and she
understood what this meant to him.
She’s
still not sure why they’re here, but she knows this is what they need
to be doing. This morning
she was on the phone with Sonjay Dutt, and it became clear to her
that her husband didn’t leave on his terms. This Sunday, Jarrett is
finishing this on his terms one last time. So
yeah, after all the hype for the hours before this show, it seems
that it’s Jarrett coming in for one match on
a nothing show and that’s it
for now. Some game changer.
Bram
vs. Vader
Yes,
that Vader, who wrestled one match for TNA back in 2003. Vader
is in workout gear and runs
Bram over to start before hitting his big clothesline. More
power offense sets up the Vader Bomb for two and Bram hits him in the
ribs with a pipe for the DQ at 3:40.
Rating:
F. Considering Vader is about
58 years old, this wasn’t bad. What is bad is the fact that they
actually had Bram hit him with a metal pipe instead of pinning him
like he should have done to a veteran like Vader. This dumb, dumb
booking is so old at this point, but at least Vader looked fine.
Post
match Matt Morgan comes out for the save and knocks Bram to the
floor.
Sgt.
Chris Melendez vs. Eric Young
This
was set up a few weeks back when Young choked Melendez with his
prosthetic leg. Young takes
over to start as the announcers act like this is the biggest show in
the history of ever. Young plants him with a DDT for two and gets
the same off a neckbreaker. We
hit a chinlock for a bit before Young tries to rip the leg off again.
Melendez fights back, ducks
his head and gets piledriven for the pin at 3:47. This was a squash.
Rating:
D. The match sucked for the
most part and I don’t like Young, but this was the only way this
booking should have gone. Young is a former World Champion and spent
the last month fighting Kurt Angle. Melendez is a rookie with a
handicap and no important wins to his name. There was no reason for
this to be a competitive match and it wasn’t in the slightest.
Back
from a break with the Rising fighting the Beat Down Clan because
THESE TWO TEAMS HAVE TO FIGHT FOREVER BECAUSE THERE IS NOTHING ELSE
THEY CAN POSSIBLY EVER DO. Hernandez
returns and helps the BDC clean house.
Match
#5 in the Tag Team Title series is next week. Also next week: Taryn
defends the Knockouts Title against Brooke and Awesome Kong.
Matt
Hardy vs. Kurt Angle
Non-title.
Hardy takes over to start
as Josh (incorrectly) calls this a first time ever match. Angle
slams Matt down and grabs a chinlock. A
quick slugout sets up rolling Germans from Angle followed by an Angle
Slam for two. With both guys down, Josh announces Aries vs. Richards
for Slammiversary with the winner getting to pick the stipulations
for the fifth match next week. Matt misses the moonsault and gets
Germaned some more, only to come back with a Side Effect. The
Twist of Fate gets two but Angle countered a second attempt into the
ankle lock for the tap at 6:58.
Rating:
C. This was fine. Matt was a
weird choice for an opponent when Carter has his own personal
bodyguard walking around but almost never having a match of his own.
Still though, good enough here, even though it was just trading
finishers for a few minutes until they got to the ending.
Ethan
Carter III and Tyrus come out but Angle fights them off and makes
Carter tap to end the show.
Overall
Rating:
D. This was like TNA’s
Greatest Hits in one night. Let’s see: gimmick match that didn’t
need to be a gimmick match, a bunch of returns that don’t mean much,
a table war that no one wants to see, a legend beating a young up and
comer for no logical reason and a meaningless title change.
When
the big news broke about the Jarretts being back, I had hope. I
wanted to believe that something was actually going to change around
here because I want it to change. I want TNA to be fun again, but
instead it’s the same stuff we’ve seen forever: short term thinking
with stuff like Slammiversary being treated like the least important
show since…..well since their last pay per view actually.
It’s
so frustrating watching a company that has so many good pieces
consistently screw things up. There
was so much potential over the years in TNA but they’ve spent so much
time messing up everything over the years that I can’t bring myself
to buy into them again. Now it seems like their time is measured in
months and then….they’re probably going to hang around because
Dixie can talk people into letting her get on TV and then screw up
another deal, all the while wasting all the talent and potential they
have. The show tried, but as usual they were going in the wrong
direction most of the night.
Results
Tigre
Uno b. Grado and Low Ki – Phoenix splash to Low Ki
Velvet
Sky b. Angelina Love – Stunner
Dirty
Heels b. Wolves – Low blow to Edwards
Vader
b. Bram via DQ when Bram used a pipe
Eric
Young b. Chris Melendez – Piledriver
Kurt
Angle b. Matt Hardy – Ankle lock
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