The SmarK Rant for Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling–08.01.84

The SmarK Rant for Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling – 08.01.84 Might as well bang out some of these Black History Month specials before we have to go back to forgetting about all the black people of the world again for the other 11 months of the year. Your host is Bob Caudle. Brian Adidas v. Paul Kelly Some REALLY impressive video quality on this one, actually, which probably stems from the filmed look. At what point did “Adidas” become shortened to “Adias”, I wonder? Adidas is kind of looking like Dave Meltzer at this point, actually. He finishes the jobber with an airplane spin at 2:30. Assassin #1 v. Brett Hart That’s Barry Horowitz, not the more famous Bret Hart. The Assassin (Jody Hamilton, father of Nick Patrick) controls with a headlock, but Hart works the arm while Paul Jones claims that Assassin has never lost a taped fist match before. Yeah, back in 1984 that used to be an extreme stipulation. Hart continues working the arm, but the TAPED FIST OF DOOM finishes for Assassin at 4:00. Meanwhile, the always electrifying Jim Crockett Jr. announces the signing of Barry Windham to the most lucrative deal ever signed by a pro athlete, complete with a Z28 convertible thrown in. He’s looking forward to Starrcade ’84! Yeah, in fact he wasn’t even on that show. We go to the tape of Windham upsetting Harley Race on TV to really build him up. Jimmy Valient v. Gary Royal As usual, Valient’s music gets scrubbed. Valient with his usual punching and choking (and he’s the babyface!) before finishing with a sleeper at 1:40. This was a virtual marathon compared to how fast he would usually finish jobbers around this time. Meanwhile, Rufus R. Jones is also looking forward to Starrcade ’84. Apparently he was the King of Wrestling at this point. Ivan Koloff & Don Kernodle v. Rufus R. Jones & Pistol Pez Whatley Koloff and Kernodle were the tag champs at this point, as Kernodle was a turncoat, albeit one who didn’t go full Russian like Barry Darsow did. Whatley quickly drops Kernodle with a headbutt for two and Jones comes in with a cradle for two. They work the arm and Koloff comes in, only to get double-teamed as well. Jones slowly works the armbar and Whatley comes in to pick up the pace, only to get nailed in the heel corner. Kernodle with a powerslam for two. Back to Jones, who hits Koloff with shoulderblocks, but misses a blind charge. He quickly tags out to Pez again and he’s a house of fire, but goes with an abdominal stretch as his big finish of choice and gets nailed by a flying Kernodle as a result. Koloff gets the pin at 7:30 off that. Rufus was just awful and even Koloff bumping all over for him couldn’t save this. * So…I guess this was WWE honoring black history? Meanwhile, Tully Blanchard might defend the TV title again sometime if Crockett can come up with the money. Maybe. Meanwhile, Bob Caudle accuses the Assassin of NOT ACTUALLY HAVING AN INJURED HAND! Paul Jones admits that, yeah, he’s just taping his fist so that he can punch Jimmy Valient in the face. Meanwhile, Ric Flair meets up with Blackjack Mulligan and Dusty Rhodes out in the backwoods somewhere while they’re all drinking and shooting. Flair of course is still rocking a $4000 suit, but rips off his shirt to show that he means well and needs help against Wahoo McDaniel and Tully Blanchard. They agree to have a beer and shoot some stuff in celebration of their newfound alliance. The Renegade v. Jeff Sword Renegade is Jay Youngblood, who for some reason is not being referred to by that name, even with Mark Youngblood at ringside. He works a very extended headlock and puts Sword down with a chop, and finishes with a clothesline and flying chop at 3:25. Not sure what that rebranding was about. Meanwhile, The Russians feel like all Americans are weak and unworthy of their titles. Nikita was still working on the Russian accent at this point, but he typically didn’t say much anyway. Wahoo McDaniel & Tully Blanchard v. Sam Houston & Vinny Valentino Dusty Rhodes is on commentary and he’s looking for the UPSET, baby. The jobbers manage to avoid Wahoo’s chops, but Vinny gets caught in the heel corner and beat up. Over to Houston and Tully cuts him off immediately, then slingshots him into a Wahoo chop. Slingshot suplex finishes at 2:30. Well, no upset there, sorry Dusty. The Pulse Glad to see this stuff start trickling in now, even lacking in context like it is.