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The SmarK Rant for WCW Monday Nitro–09.11.95

The SmarK Rant for WCW Monday Nitro – 09.11.95 – Live from Miami, FL – Your hosts are Uncle Eric, Mongo and the Brain. Sounds like a morning radio show, actually. – I should note that although the first show from the mall was a drastically different look for a wrestling show, this show looks 100% like any episode I’ve ever seen of Nitro, minus the nWo logos everywhere. They really hit the formula right off the bat. Sabu v. Alex Wright Sabu takes Wright down and chokes him right away, then hits a springboard kneedrop and a rana that puts them on the floor. Sabu follows with a baseball slide and somersault press, then dives off a chair and splats on the railing. Wright with a dropkick and he comes back in with a missile dropkick to put Sabu on the floor again. Wright baseball slides him and follows with a tentative tope, but Sabu goes up, so Wright brings him in with a superplex. Sabu sends him into the turnbuckles and gets a springboard leg lariat, but Wright hits the german suplex for two. Wright goes up, but Sabu brings him down with a weak victory roll off the top for the pin at 4:00. What was that shitty finish? Fast-paced and crazy before that, though. **1/2 Sabu puts him through a table afterwards, so they reverse the decision. Weak sauce. Ric Flair comes out to talk about his disappointment in Arn Anderson’s behavior as of late, but Lex Luger quickly interrupts and has nothing to say. OK then. Sting v. VK Wallstreet Oh, in case you’re tempted to change the channel, Shawn Michaels beats the big guy with a superkick that wouldn’t win a green belt at the local YMCA. Sting controls with armdrags and Wallstreet bails. Back in, Wallstreet tosses Sting, but Sting springboards back in with a sloppy clothesline. Wallstreet elbows him down again and drops elbows, but Sting reverses a samoan drop into a sunset flip for two. Sting rams him into the turnbuckles and drives him into the corner with a high knee, and the Stinger splash follows. High cross finishes at 4:06. Didn’t they just have a big promo for Wallstreet in the first show and build him up as a big deal? *1/2 Scott Norton v. Randy Savage Norton attacks and gets a short clothesline, then blocks a sunset flip with a two-handed choke. Savage comes back with a hiptoss and clotheslines him out, then back in with a pretty nice clothesline that Norton actually SELLS. Savage to the top, but Norton catches him in a bearhug and pounds the back. Powerbomb gets two. Norton hits a backbreaker and carries him up into a press slam, and a powerslam gets two. Bischoff has this ridiculous deathly serious concern going for Savage’s back, even though the match is only 3 minutes in. Savage bails and Norton brings him back in with Randy Orton’s DDT, then goes up. Savage faceplants him on the way down and hits a high knee to the back, but the Dungeon of Doom runs in. Sharkalanche falls on top of Norton, pinning him down, and Savage drops the big elbow for the pin at 5:39. That is a truly retarded finish. Norton wouldn’t even lay down for the pinfall finish without an additional 400 pound guy on top of him. ** WCW World title: Hulk Hogan v. Lex Luger Mongo notes that if you’ve never watched a wrestling match in your life before, you should get on the edge of your seat and watch this one. Wouldn’t it be assumed that you’ve seen a wrestling match before in your life, given that there’s been three of them in this show so far? Mongo makes my ears bleed. Luger goes with the headlock and catches Hogan with a suplex, but Hulk no-sells it. Lex with another headlock as Mongo notes that “the owners of WCW aren’t fining these guys for excessive hitting”. What the FUCK is this guy talking about? Luger with a powerslam and he’s already go the rack, but Lex releases too soon and acts like he’s won. He gets two instead and it’s time to Hulk up. Big boot and legdrop, but the Dungeon runs in AGAIN for the DQ at 5:30. * – So we take a break, and with everyone upset at Luger for not getting attacked, Mean Gene comes out for the interview. Hogan and Savage are all over Lex, but Sting sticks up for him and wants him to be a part of the Hogan team for WarGames. Again I ask: Who was so stupid not to put Sting & Luger v. Hogan & Savage on PPV in a giant stadium? Anyway, of course it turned out that Luger and Jimmy Hart really were in cahoots with the Dungeon, so there’s one rare bit of forethought from the WCW bookers. The Pulse: It’s not like Nitro was doing anything revolutionary at that point in terms of the presentation. It was the same stupid run-in finishes that RAW was presenting and the same dumb booking mistakes, but at least it wasn’t stale and boring like RAW.