QOTD #25: Overhyped

Today’s Question:
Most new wrestlers get hype
before they arrive; some more than others. Which wrestler really didn’t live up to any of
it?

We’ll answer that tomorrow. To start the discussion click “Comments”
or scroll to the end of this piece. Otherwise, stick around to talk about Vince
McMahon with me.

I asked you for random moments, and you put forth some
incredible stuff. I don’t want to waste time, so let’s jump right in.
Matt Steele: My favorite moment from WM19 is bloody Vince
flipping everyone off as he’s being wheeled out. But that deranged look on his
face as he peers over the apron is certainly fantastic.
WCW1987: “It’s me Austin! It was me ALL
ALONG!”
This might have been the worst payoff to a mystery this side
of the Gobbledygooker but leave it to Vince to play it up for all its worth.
ETB757: Destroying his quads during his Royal Rumble
2005 run-in. Having to sit in the ring and bark orders at Cena and Batista
cracks me up EVERY SINGLE TIME.
I must have rewound this about 40 times that night, and watched
it over and over. It wasn’t the injury. It wasn’t the barking. It was the fact
that Vince sat there trying not to show any pain, like he was SUPPOSED to be
sitting down at that moment. DAMMIT I’M VINCE MCMAHON AND I’LL SIT IF I WANT
TO! My friends and I just howled watching Vince no-sell two torn quads. His
return a couple of months later, stomping around as hard as ever on purpose
slayed me too.
CruelConnectionNumber2:
First thing I think of with Vince is him
yelling to Trish: “Oh, you’re sorry! You’re sorry! You’re sorry? TAKE OFF
YOUR BRA!”
Totally stealing this the next time my wife apologizes to me
for anything.
Skinsfan026: Without question when he returned in 2000 to
save the Rock against Big Show/Shane/HHH/Stephanie. When the limo pulls up and
JR goes “What the hell is this now, Ah THAT’S VINCE McMAHON” Then
just punches through HHH on the way to the ring. Bigtime mark out moment for
me.
Yep, I absolutely loved this. He’s about the only
non-wrestler I could ever believe genuinely having the balls enough to start
throwing haymakers at roided up professionals, while believing he’s also crazy
enough to make it work.
VintageECW: Genetic Jackhammer, saw that live, the day
after KotR 01.
Of course, this made it on to Yahoo
Questions
.
Nebb28: Taking a bedpan to the head, and then the
enema from Austin. One of my all time favorite segments.
WhiteGoodman: Lying in a hospital bed and saying in
disgust “Mr. Socko!” after he kicked Mankind out of the room. Gave
birth to a sweatsock gimmick that was more popular than 70% of the roster.
YankeesHoganTripleHFan:
“You violated me Austin. You
violated my rectal area”
The entire hospital scene was one of the finest pieces of
comedy ever done by the WWE. From Vince’s paranoia that he was going to get
rushed by Austin, only to have Mankind protection wind up being a WORSE
prospect. Somehow, a throw-away moment of having a talking sock puppet to cheer
Vince up winds up becoming Foley’s trademark for 15 years thanks to Vince
rolling his eyes and delivering the line “Mr. Socko” as only he could. Then,
thinking the heat’s off, Doctor Austin dives in, smacks Vince with a bedpan as
hard as he can, before finishing him off with an enema. Truthfully, a
prison-style man on man violation should never be funny, but Vince took it and
sold it like a champ.
PrimeTimeTen: “Life sucks and then you DIE!!”
J.Frizz: I also immediately think of this exaggerated
Vince walk.
MichaelXavier: This is awesome, but only ranks as #2 on
“Best Vince McMahon GIFs”
Okay, I just died.

Cultstatus: I wish this dude wouldn’t use my answers for
his bullshit. If you have something to say, reply to my post like a normal
person.
Tomorrow’s Question: Who peed in Cultstatus’ mother?

byort: Shortly before I started watching wrestling
in the ’80’s, David Letterman had Vince McMahon as a correspondent on his 3rd
Anniversary show in a quest to see who would deliver the “Late Night”
baby! As you can tell, the audience was laughing at Vince’s over-the-top
delivery, but he was definitely true to his commentator self.
Uncruisimatic_Buck_Nasty:
“I’M DAMN SICK AND TIRED…
SICK AND TIRED, SICK
AND TIRED…
DAMN SICK AND TIRED OF
WATCHING YOU, WATCHING YOU…
WATCHING YOU WALK
AROUND WITH THAT WWF CHAMPIONSHIP BELT!”
Jon Eks: One random moment I always think about is
sometime during 1998 when Undertaker and Kane were in cahoots together (or were
they?), and Undertaker came out dressed as Kane. The next week, Mr. McMahon
gets on the stick and is openly speculating about Undertaker and Kane working
together and quips this line (that always goes around in my head): “If
he’s not working with his brother, how does one come to be dressed as Kane? Do
you show up to Sears and say, ‘Yes, I’d like a Kane suit, please.'” For
reasons I cannot pinpoint, the visual of Mr. McMahon going to Sears and
politely requesting “a Kane suit” always cracks me up.
I remember this, and I’m laughing re-reading it. I prefer
the visual of an angry Vince McMahon going to the customer service desk and
giving them “I’D LIKE A KANE SUIT DAMMIT!” Followed of course by “TAKE OFF YOUR
BRA!”
Extant1979: Growing up as a wrestling fan in the 1980s,
my main memories of Vince McMahon will always be on commentary. Rewatching some
of the older stuff now, like SNME, it’s fun to hear the heel announcers
(Ventura and Heenan, mainly) talk about how McMahon better watch himself so he
doesn’t get fired from his job. Bobby and Jesse always seemed to have more fun
at McMahon’s expense than with Monsoon, and I’m guessing it’s trying to
maintain a level of kayfabe about Vince not actually owning the company. Getting
to hear the McMahon-Ventura team one more time when Jesse was a Raw guest host
is probably one of my best memories of that insipid era.
LeeleePhoenix: Vince lustfully staring at Stephanie’s
cleavage at the wedding, along with the really weird incest angles he’s done
over the years. Vince really creeps me out, I’d pay a pretty penny for a shoot
that released all his secrets.
Lord knows she nixed a full-fledged incest storyline,
asking “who would want to see that?” Of course, not the people who’d ever want
to see necrophilia, I’ll tell you that much.
TheConvictor: I always enjoyed his shit-stirring during
the roundtable segments on Prime Time Wrestling. Mr. Perfect face turn is a
“perfect” example of this. Nearly a year before it happens, McMahon
does a great job pitting Perfect against Heenan by revealing that Heenan snuck
a clause into Perfect’s contract that he couldn’t ever face Ric Flair (who was
gunning for the WWF Title at the time). McMahon even needles Perfect when they
plug the “Hulkster Hotline,” asking him if he needed Heenan’s
permission to enter one of the hotline’s contests. Many months later, when they
were setting up Survivor Series, McMahon does a great job stirring dissension
between Perfect and Heenan and playing on Perfect’s ego to get him to dump his
pals. As a kid (before I understood who exactly McMahon was), it always struck me
as odd that Vince would say whatever he wanted and even get in the heels’
faces, but nothing bad would ever happen to him. In fact, everyone seemed oddly
deferential to him. Makes sense in hindsight…
Mind blown.
parallax1978: “I have a better work ethic than
God” during the HBK feud. I often said that same thing when I would work
on Sunday’s (which is now a chilling thought).
James: Another great moment: the McMahon Family
Prayer before his match with HBK at WrestleMania 22. It starts with the
greatest opening line to a prayer of all time: “God, I don’t like you, and
you don’t like me.”
The ONLY person in all of television who could book an angle
as offensive as “MYSELF vs. GOD” in a fully serious manner, and pull it off is
Vince McMahon. Hokeyness to the 9’s.
riraho: Piledriver Dance

BeardMoney: I would say the angle where Vince’s limo
exploded, but Paul London ruined the entire thing by smiling. What a spot
monkey.
Devin Harris: When Shane aligned with Stone Cold, Vince
was so heartbroken that there was speculation on the Saturday clip shows that
he was going to retire. They had all the office people giving their goodbyes
and what not. So Vince comes out on Raw and gives the most epic promo of all
time. He says that he’s not going to step down until he’s dead and finishes it
by calling all of the fans assholes.
I want the stockholders to hold a vote which decides Vince
McMahon needs to be overthrown as CEO, followed by Vince holding a press
conference as the majority shareholder vowing to do the right thing. Then he’d
recite the above, word for word. It might not help the stock price, but it
WOULD be replayed on CNN for the rest of our lives.
Paul Meekin: The “OH MY GOD LOOK AT….PUUUUKE”
from Beyond The Mat. I don’t know why, but something about that meeting between
him and Droz where Vince went from business guy to carny-esque carnival
promoter at one terrified me AND made me realize the kind of mad genius he is.
There’s a fine line between mad genius, and full-fledged
lunatic. The lunatic would never offer you a sip of coffee to help you
PUUUUUKE.
NoCash: I’ll go with his 2001 Playboy interview.
“MCMAHON:
[Pauses] That was at a very young age. I remember, probably in the first grade,
being invited to a matinee film with my stepbrother and his girlfriends, and I
remember them playing with me. Playing my penis, and giggling. I thought that
was pretty cool. That was my initiation into sex. At that age you don’t
necessarily achieve an erection, but it was cool. At around the same time there
was a girl my age who was, in essence, my cousin. Later in life she actually
wound up marrying that asshole Leo Lupton, my stepfather! Boy this sounds like
Tobacco Road. Anyway, I remember the two of us being so curious about each
other’s bodies, but not knowing what the hell to do. We would go into the woods
and get naked together. It felt good. And for some reason I wanted to put
crushed leaves into her. Don’t know why, but I remember that. I don’t remember
the first time I had intercourse, believe it or not.
PLAYBOY: Your growing
up was pretty accelerated.
MCMAHON: God,
yes.”
Just … all of this. She’s essentially his cousin, and she
married his step-father. And his first sexual feelings involved him wanting to
put CRUSHED LEAVES INSIDE OF HER. The CEO of a publically traded billion dollar
company goes into the pages of Playboy, and announces that he wanted to put
crushed leaves inside his cousin’s vag. VINCE MCMAHON.
Will1225: The bump Vince took off the cage in his cage
match with Austin at St. Valentine’s Day Massacre. I just started watching WWF
and wrestling altogether around that time and the Vince bump was the first holy
shit bump I had ever seen
Never ever let it be said Vince was unwilling to put himself
through anything his staff would do. I’ve heard in numerous jobs over the years
frontline workers grumble and throw out “I wish the executives would come down
here and just (insert crappy job) so they see what we go through.” Not a single
wrestler can do that in the WWE, because lord knows if Vince McMahon could do
it, he was going to.
AverageJoeEveryman:
Another is the training videos with Shane
for Royal Rumble 1999. The best was chasing the chicken while apparently the
chicken had a video camera to record the incident from its angle.

Jackson Smith: Vince’s reaction to Mick Foley winning the
World title on Raw. Half stunned headshakes, “no…no..”, and then
finally “ANYBODY but him, no!”
Joedust: Vince/Shane at WrestleMania X-7 is a million
times better than it had any right to be, and Vince getting his ultimate
comuppance after months of smarmy slimey heelness. Trish, Shane, Linda, and
Mick Foley all get their revenge on Vince.
*Shane beats the fuck
out of him in the opening of the match, including some legit potatoes that gave
Vince a black eye.
* Trish turns on
Vince, gives him a nice hard slap, then chases Steph off in an awesome cat
fight.
* Linda “comes
out of her comatose state” and kicks Vince square in the nuts (watch this
match and watch THE ENTIRE CROWD come to their feet along with Linda).
* Mick punches out
Vince and gives him the big running knee in the corner as the crowd loses their
shit.
* Shane debuts the
SHANE TERMINATOR and beats daddy at his father’s creation.
Really, could Vince’s
defeat have been any more complete?
This applies to any major feud he was apart of. Steve Austin
at St. Valentine’s Day Massacre, Ric Flair at Rumble 2002, Hulk Hogan at
Wrestlemania XIX … To quote Vince McMahon, he knew when it was time to “eat
shit and learn to like it!”
We could go on and on. My choice is outside of Vince’s peak
as a character, but anytime I think of Vince, one of two things comes to mind
first. Either the quad incident we talked about above, or this:

I genuinely believe that so many of Vince’s most offensive
moments exist because someone out there suggested he probably shouldn’t do that
on TV. The WWE is Vince McMahon’s fantasy playground, and he’ll do it if he
wants, because HE’S VINCE MCMAHON DAMMIT!
Thanks for a great thread today, I loved this one. I’ll be
back again tomorrow. Until then, take us home Vince …