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Matt’s Recap: WWE Payback – 6/1/2014

Here we are again for another Event Formerly Known as a Pay Per View.
Apparently,
The Rhodes Brothers were added at the last moment as was Bo Dallas. How
Dallas and the Rhodes’s are even on this card is beyond me and should
really show you how thin this roster has become.

Why
they couldn’t just have Brie fight Steph is also confusing. Here’s an
angle that would do double duty: they push a Divas Match everyone would
be interested in seeing and they tie it into Daniel Byran’s plight by
saying the the big title is on the line. If Brie wins, title stays with
Bryan. If Steph wins, the Authority strips the title.

But, no.

We get Bo Dallas vs. Kofi and Big E vs. Rusev. And, before you protest, does anyone actually care about either of those matches?

That’s what I thought.

Anyhow, here’s your card

  • El Torito (w/ Diego & Fernando) vs. Hornswaggle (w/ Heath Slater, Jinder Mahal, and Drew McIntyre) in a Mask vs. Hair Match
  • Sheamus (champion) vs. Cesaro (challenger) (w/ Paul Heyman) for the WWE United States Championship
  • Evolution (Triple H, Randy Orton, and Batista) vs. The Shield
    (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, and Roman Reigns) in a No Holds Barred
    Six-Man Elimination Tag Team Match
  • John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt (w/ Luke Harper & Erick Rowan) in a Last Man Standing Match
  • Bad News Barrett (champion) vs. Rob Van Dam (challenger) for the WWE Intercontinental Championship
  • Paige (champion) vs. Alicia Fox (challenger) for the WWE Divas Championship
  • Big E vs. Rusev
  • Bo Dallas vs. Kofi Kingston
  • Cody Rhodes & Goldust vs. RybAxel (Curtis Axel & Ryback)

Let’s begin, shall we?

(For the record: Torito beat Hornswaggle and then did a terrible job of shaving his head.)

We start with Aloe Blacc’s “Ticking Bomb” along with the cracked ice graphics, introducing Payback.

Promo
shows that there are those who are remain in charge and those who wish
to ascend into the light. We get clips of the major feuds, Cena/Wyatt
and Evolution/Shield.

It’s time for PAYBACK!

W are LIVE(!!!) from the Allstate Arena in Chicago, Illinois!

JBL, Cole, and King are your guys on the mic.

Carlos Cabrera, Marcelo Rodriguez and Ricardo Rodriguez are on the Spanish mics.

Sheamus is out for his match with Cesaro and we get a recap of this feud from beginning until now.

MATCH #1: Sheamus (champion) vs. Cesaro (challenger) (w/ Paul Heyman) for the WWE United States Championship
Paul
Heyman is out to advocate for a “Paul Heyman guy”. The crowd chants,
big-time, for CM Punk. Heyman says that “HE is not here tonight” because
he’s at The United Center, watching the Blackhawks getting their
“Streak broken” just like Brock Lesnar did to the Undertaker. He finally
introduces Cesaro. The two guys comes out running. Sheamus hits some
immediate forearms and a kneelift. He goes for a Rolling Senton but
Cesaro counters it and starts kicking at Sheamus in the corner. Sheamus
comes back with some elbows and a short-arm clothesline but misses an
elbow smash. Cesaro hits a nice running uppercut in the corner and
follows it up with some of those in the corner. Sheamus counters on an
Irish Whip with a Rolling Senton, then goes for 10 Beats but Cesaro
drops his neck on the ropes. Sheamus comes back and hits a forearm and
Ten Beats. Then he grabs Cesaro and does it AGAIN.

Crowd
just shits all over Sheamus as he takes Cesaro and dumps him into the
crowd barrier. He rolls Cesaro back in and goes for another ten beats
but Cesaro gets free and hits a HUGE uppercut when Sheamus goes for the
Battering Ram. Cesaro grabs Sheamus and rams his head into the ring
post, then hits the Powerplex on Sheamus from outside the ropes! Cesaro
hits a huge powerbomb and chest stomp and gets two. Cesaro continues and
hits uppercuts in two corners. Sheamus rushes out of the second corner
and hits a huge Irish Curse Backbreaker. He stomps at Cesaro and
clotheslines him to the mat, dropping a huge knee on Cesaros neck twice
from the second rope. Sheamus goes up again and huts a third, and NEARLY
gets a fall. Cesaro comes back and hits a HUGE flying uppercut from the
turnbuckle and gets two. He rushes Sheamus in the corner and runs into a
big boot twice. Sheamus goes to the top rope, misses and attack but
rolls out of it. He misses a clothesline and Cesaro hits a HUGE uppercut
out of nowhere and NEARLY gets a pin.

Cesaro slaps at
Sheamus and whips him into the ropes but Sheamus comes back with a
powerslam, getting two. Sheamus sets up for the Brogue but misses.
Cesaro hits the German Suplex and gets two! Cesaro tries for the
Neutralizer but Sheamus counters with White Noise…1…2…KICKOUT.
Wow. Both guys get to their feet. Sheamus goes for the Cloverleaf.
Cesaro kicks Sheamus away. Cesaro goes off the ropes but Sheamus catches
him and puts him into the Cloverleaf again! Cesaro claws for the ropes
and gets there. Cesaro hits an Inverted Suplex and hits the Cesaro Swing
getting nearly 20 spins. Cesaro goes for the Neutralizer but Sheamus
hits the Small Package pin for the win at 11:27.
WINNER AND STILL CHAMPION: Sheamus via Small Package
GRADE: Solid A. That was great. Like the Main Event match, only with an ending.

Post-match, Sheamus grins ear to ear as Cesaro and Heyman cannot believe it.

Plug for the WWE Countdown Show.

We’re back and we get a lead-up to the next match.

MATCH #2: Goldust & Cody Rhodes vs. RybAxel (Ryback & Curtis Axel)
Dust
and Axel to start. Dust gets a nice slap in the corner and Axel comes
back with punches. He tosses Dust into the ropes and Dust reverses and
hits an Atomic Drop and armdrag, tagging in Cody. He’s all over Axel and
a tag to Ryback. The Rhodes Brothers double team him with a kick to the
stomach and a follow-up elbow to the back of his head. Tag to Axel and
Axel hits a quick kneelift and tags in Ryback. Double teaming and a
corner splash. Series of tags back and forth. Axel hits a double
axehandle off the buckle. Tag to Ryback who stomps at Dust and works on
his arm. Ryback hits a huge suplex and gets two. Quick armlock by Ryback
as the crowd is behind Dust to escape. He does but Ryback body slams
him. He picks Dust up but Dust counters with a small package for two
and then hits an elbow. Dust trues for a tag but can’t do it. Axel is
in and stops him by slinging him into the heel corner. Dust fights out
and hits a NICE rolling Powerbomb for two. He makes the hot tag to Cody
who boots Ryback and a Missile Dropkick. Axel goes off the top rope from
the outside but Cody catches him as well and then hits a Double
Moonsault on both men. Cody gets two and goes for the Disaster Kick but
Ryback catches him and throws him into Dust. Ryback hits the Meathook
but Dust makes the save on the pin. Ryback rushes and gets caught in
Cross-Rhodes! Axel makes the save and gets tossed out of the ring. Cody
goes for another move but Ryback hits Shell Shock for the win at around
7:31.
WINNERS: RybAxel via Shell Shock
GRADE: C+. That wasn’t too bad. A little quick but that was fitting.

Post-match,
Cody sits in the ring and can’t believe it. Dust comes in to console
him but Cody’s not having it. He asks for a mic. Cody says, “Brother to
brother, you need a better tag team partner than me.” Then he leaves and
Dust looks destroyed.


JBL: “I wasn’t expecting that.” Really?

We get an ad for whatever shitty Mountain Dew flavor the announcers are pretending to like.

We get a video of Wrigley Field as the boys lament the fact that the ballpark will never have a winner.

Lana
is introduced as she plugs Russia and Putin. Rusev is suddenly
“residing in Moscow”, according to the announcer. He comes out waving
the Russian flag like he’s killing swarms of bees.

MATCH #3: Rusev (w/ Lana) vs. Big E
(G/F: “Yeah, you’re fucked now, Rusev! E’s got a FLAG, TOO!”) The
two run at each other and collide. Rusev takes over with giant fists. E
comes back, doing the same, but Rusev hits a German Suplex Throw on E.
He beats on E with punches and a corner splash as the crowd chants that
they want Ziggler. Rusev rushes E in the corner but E counters, hitting a
Spinebuster! Rusev struggles to get up and E HITS A SPEAR TO THE
OUTSIDE! HOLY SHIT. E gets to his feet as Lana nearly pops a vein,
screaming at Rusev to get up. E puts Rusev back in and gets two. E runs
at Rusev but Rusev hits Sweet Russian Music HARD on E’s chin. Lana tells
Rusev to CRUSH. Accolade by Rusev. E tries to escape but, fuck it. E
taps at 3:43.
WINNER: Rusev via Accolade
GRADE:
D+. Come on. A nice, big, long match could have really gotten Rusev
over. He remains boring as hell with another short match where he
practically squashes one of the better guys on the roster. What sense
does that make?

The next PPV is Money in the Bank. Whoever thought the idea of a talking pile of money was awesome needs to be fired.

Daniel Bryan and Brie Bella are backstage, talking. We can’t hear what they’re saying.


MATCH #4: Kofi Kingston vs. Bo Dallas
Speaking
of boring noobs…we begin…and Kane? He gets in the ring. Dallas
bails. Kofi attacks, gets his ass kicked, then gets Chokeslammed and
Tombstoned all as Dallas looks on. Kane hits fire and leaves the ring.
Refs tend to Kofi. Dallas grabs a mic and tells Kofi he’ll be back on
his feet. All he has to do is BO-LIEVE. Kane destroyed the wrong fucking
person.
WINNER: No contest. 
GRADE: Do you even
have to ask? By the way: the last three matches were added at the last
second. We flew threw three of them in ten minutes and one of them
wasn’t even a match. Honestly, what was the point of having them at all?
At the very least, they finally DID close the door on the Rhodes
brothers.

Clips from the Payback Kick-Off Show where Torito beat Hornswaggle and Swaggle got his head shaved.

MATCH #5: Rob Van Dam (challenger) vs. Bad News Barrett (champion) for the WWE Intercontinental Championship
Barrett
says that he’s got bad news: RVD isn’t going to be the champ and that
RVD is Old Yeller. Lock-up and Barrett gets his arm locked but fights
out. Quick brawl between the two. Both men punch each other until RVD
hits a spinning kick. Crowd is split. (G/F: “So every single feud has to have a Let’s Go Cena/Cena sucks chant, huh?”) Barrett
gets tossed from the ring. RVD kicks him and the fight spills outside.
RVD tosses him into the barricade and punches at him. He breaks the
count and then hits a huge Flying Roundhouse as the crowd chants, “ECW”.
RVD puts Barrett into the ring and hits a flying legdrop off the top
rope. Two count. RVD tosses Barrett into the corner but Barrett reverses
and kicks RVD in the nads as RVD misses a handstand counter. RVD goes
outside and Barrett hits an elbow off the mat. The fight goes back in
the ring. Barrett drapes RVD on the top rope, punches at him and
celebrates, then hits a kneelift and gets a two-count.

Headlock
by Barrett as the announcers joke about how much more interesting
British celebrities would be more interesting if they delivered bad
news. RVD gets to his feet and hits another spinning kick on a counter.
RVD hits running clotheslines and rams Barrett’s head into the corner
buckle. He tries Rolling Thunder but Barrett gets up. RVD puts him back
down with Sweet RVD Music and Rolling Thunder. He goes for the Splash
but misses by a mile. Barrett misses the Bullhammer! RVD hits a Scissor
Pin but gets two! RVD gets up and flies right into Winds of Change! Two
count! Barrett goes for the Bullhammer outside but hits the ring post!
Fight goes back inside and RVD hits a HUGE DDT! Two Count. He goes for a
Senton off the ropes but Barrett puts the knees up and RVD goes down.
Barrett gets up and hits the Bullhammer and we’re done at 9:28.
WINNER AND STILL CHAMPION: Bad News Barrett via Bullhammer
GRADE: B-. Finally picked up on the last half. Well-fought.

King takes a swig of Mountain Dew, makes a face like he just swallow cow testicles and then grins.

We get a recap of the whole Daniel Bryan title thing.

With
that, Steph gets in the ring wearing a body dress. Homina,
homina…Steph thanks the audience and says that tonight is a historic
night. Will Daniel Bryan give up the title or will she be forced to fire
Brie. She brings Daniel Bryan out. The crowd pops big-time. Steph says
this is all on him. She says that she knows they’ll conceive some
“weird, bearded babies” but she wants to know what story the Daniel
Bryan family will tell those children.

Daniel Bryan
says that Steph’s ignoring what this audience wants. He’s giving Steph
the chance to change her mind. The crowd chants for CM Punk. The look on
Bryan’s face is pure incredulity. Steph says that the crowd doesn’t
care. They WANT him to quit, just like CM Punk.

Bryan says that Steph is…what’s the word?

Brie: “BITCH.”

Steph
says that Brie made a poor choice in a husband. Brie says that it’s
time for Bryan to do the right thing. She puts her hands out. Bryan
takes the belt in his hands…Brie blocks her husband and then says
she’s not gonna be a powerless victim. Steph doesn’t control her. Steph
says Brie works for Steph. Brie says she’s wrong. She can’t fire her,
She QUITS.

Steph goes Sheer Evil and laughs in Brie’s
face, cackling big time. So Brie slaps Steph in the face! The crowd
loves it. Daniel Bryan and Brie do the YES Chant. Steph leaves the ring,
totally shocked.

NEXT TIME ON LEGENDS HOUSE: The wrestlers do a roast for some reason. 

Back from break, Cole attaches the words, “critically acclaimed” to the show. They recap what’s just happened.


We get a recap for the Cena/Wyatt feud.

MATCH #6: Bray Wyatt (w/ Luke Harper & Erick Rowan) vs. John Cena (w/ Jimmy & Jey Uso)
Crowd
loves the Wyatts so it doesn’t look like the King Beating Spot worked
much. Wyatt waits outside the ring as Cena is introduced. Cena comes
out, sans Usos. That makes no sense whatsoever. The Wyatt Family
gets in the ring to jump Cena…and HERE are the Usos. The Wyatts bail.
The Usos pound the mat to get the crowd roaring and an Uso chant starts.
This is awesome. It’s a brawl to start. Bray hits a mean uppercut and a
back elbow off an Irish Whip. Bray puts Cena in the corner and hits a
running clothesline. Cena gets to his feet, Bray dances around the ring
with him and Cena hits moves 1 through 3, then goes for the Five Knuckle
Shuffle and hits it. AA attempt doesn’t work and Bray hits a Gutbuster,
kneeing Cena in the stomach with a knee. Bray kicks Cena but misses the
Reverse Senton. Cena tries the STF but Wyatt kicks out and hits the
HUGE Spinebuster.

Bray goes into Hanging Spider mode
and Sister Abigail but Cena blocks. The two goes into the ropes and
Wyatt hits a shoulderblock. Cena hangs off the ropes and Wyatt drops
Cena’s neck off the ropes. Cena gets to his feet. The Family comes to
help out and the Usos back up Cena. Wyatt gets back into the ring and
goes for a Superplex but Cena breaks out with a headbutt. Cena goes top
rope and hits the Flying Legdrop. Both men are down. Bray gets up. As
does Cena. Cena tries the AA but Wyatt counters and hits Sister Abigail.
Cena twitches at 5. Cena to his knee at 7 and to his feet at 8. Bray
rushes at Cena and flies right into the AA! Wyatt Spiders up at 7.

The
Wyatts hit the ring and so do the Usos. It’s a brawl that spills
outside. Harper flies outside but hits Rowan instead of the Usos. One of
the Usos goes off the top rope and splashes both Wyatts and the other
Uso. Back in the ring, Wyatt has a chair and clubs Cena with it. Cena
rolls outside. Cena gets to his knees at 6 and then to his feet. Bray
misses the chair to the head, Cena grabs it and clubs Bray across the
back. Back in the ring, Cena nails Bray with the chair again. Bray’s
mouth is bleeding. Cena goes outside, looks under the mat and gets a
table, sliding it inside the ring. He sets it up. Bray attacks but Cena
gets Bray up for the AA…Bray counters and hits the Suplex Throw on
Cena THROUGH THE TABLE.

Cena’s up to his feet at 8.
Bray puts the steel steps in the ring and nails Cena in the face. He
gets the crowd to sing HGTWWIHH. Cena gets to his feet. He sets Cena up
across the steel steps and then goes outside for the chair, tossing it
into the ring. He misses the chair shot. Cena hits it instead, then
nails Bray with the steel steps. Bray rolls out of the ring and lands on
his feet. Cena lifts up the steps and throws them out of the ring right
at Bray’s head like a Cliff Lee fastball. Bray gets to his feet at 9.
Cena goes under the mat for another table, then goes after Bray instead
but Bray hits Sister Abigail! Holy shit. Cena gets to his feet at 7 as
the crowd chants, “THIS IS AWESOME”.

Bray tosses Cena
at the ring post but Cena reverses and Bray flies into the post instead.
He pulls Bray to his ropes and goes for a powerbomb on the steps but
Bray reverses it and back drops Cena on the steps instead. Cena is still
down at 5 and Bray flies at Cena, hitting the Reverse Senton. Cena gets
up to his knees at 5 and gets to his feet at 6. Bray kicks at Cena,
brawling outside. Bray beats on Cena, then grabs a chair but Cena
counters and hits the AA on the mat outside. During the count, The Wyatt
Family comes in out of whatever black hole they were in and attack
Cena. They help Bray up and then attack Cena some more. They go outside
and set up a table.

The Usos appear and they fly at the
Wyatts outside. Jimmy gets clubbed into the face when trying to go
outside for Harper. Tables get set up. Bray’s practically dead outside
and the ref isn’t counting. Rowan and Jey fight. Jey hits Chin Music and
then Rikishi Splashes Rowan into the table. Jimmy attacks Harper, but
Harper puts Jimmy up on the top turnbuckle AND SUPERPLEXES JIMMY THROUGH
THE TABLES OUTSIDE!!! Crowd is chanting “HOLY SHIT” as Bray and Cena
get to their feet. Cena goes for the AA but Bray kicks out, misses a
clothesline. Bray runs at Cena and they go right into the timekeeper’s
pit. The two get up and fight into the crowd. Bray picks Cena up and
dumps Bray into the pyro/audo pit, causing a firework to blow up. He
picks up Cena who grabs Bray for the AA…and CENA AA’S HIM INTO A
HARDWARE CRATE! Then he pushes another hardware crate on top of that
crate, climbs on top of it. The ref counts ten and Cena’s your winner at
around 24:30.
LAST MAN STANDING: John Cena
GRADE:
A+. Way, way, WAY better than expected. Satisfying as hell. That was
the Match of the Night so far and a candidate for Match of the Year.

Post-match, the Usos celebrate with Cena.

Plug for the Money in the Bank PPV.

Special Olympics plug.

Divas Match is next.

Me: Oh good. Here’s your Divas Match.
G/F: Why don’t you just get it over with and write the “F” in there right now?

MATCH #7: Alicia Fox (challenger) vs. Paige (champion) for the WWE Divas Championship
Lock
up and armdrag by Paige. Fox dumps Paige outside as Cole actually says,
“You can’t win the title outside the ring.” Fox and Paige fight outside
the ropes as Paige hits knees and suplexes her inside, hitting elbows
on Fox in the corner. Fox rolls outside and starts crying. Paige goes
after her but Fox trips her. Fox goes into crazy mode again, taunting
fans. Paige recovers and rams her into the barricade. Paige pulls her by
her hair up the steel steps but Fox tosses her up and into the air.
Paige crashes into the barricade and gets rolled back into the ring. Fox
hits a Bridge Suplex and gets two. Fox yells something about having her
face ruined and then hits an armlock to Bridge Chinlock. Fox puts Paige
into another submission move, bending Paige’s back over her knee, then
hits a Spinning Backbreaker on her for two. King: “You never know who a
woman truly is until you meet her in court.” Ouch. Fox goes for another
Spinning Backbreaker but decides to toss Paige outside instead. Paige
gets back in the ring with a dropkick and clotheslines, then does a
“Roman Reigns roar”. She hits the PTO and we’re done at 6:17. JBL:
“Somebody call security NOW before something bad happens.”
WINNER AND STILL CHAMPION: Paige via PTO
GRADE: D+. Eh…can we put an end to Fox now and actually test Paige with someone else?

The crowd chants, “YOU TAPPED OUT”. Fox threatens to go apeshit…but doesn’t for a change.

We get a nice shot of the city of Chicago outside the arena.

Cole
checks in with the WWE Panel, Josh Matthews, Alex Riley and Booker T.
Kofi is noticeably absent. Strangely, the panel talks about everything
except that.

We get a recap of the Shield/Evolution feud.

MATCH
#8: Evolution (Triple H, Randy Orton, and Batista) vs. The Shield (Dean
Ambrose, Seth Rollins, and Roman Reigns) in No Holds Barred Elimination
Tag Team Match

Somebody in the crowd has a sign that says,
“SPEAR ME, ROMAN”. Uh…bell rings and it’s a Pier 6 Brawl to start.
Batista and Reigns fall outside. Orton dumps Ambrose. HHH and Rollins
are in the ring. Rollins hits an Enzuguri. The right just falls into the
crowd. Orton and Ambrose brawl. You can’t follow this. Rollins dumps
HHH back in. Batista and Reigns end up back outside the ring as Batista
gets sent into the steel steps. Ambrose gets dumped into the
Timekeeper’s pit. Reigns puts Batista back in and uppercuts him. Ambrose
finds his way back into the Shield corner. Reigns tags Rollins who puts
Batista down and then stomps on him. Batista sends Rollins into the
buckle. Tag to Orton who gets elbowed off the ropes by Rollins. Tag to
Ambrose. Double Suplex by the Shield. Ambrose hits an elbow smash and
then puts Orton into a reverse leglock while taunting Evolution. Ambrose
pulls Orton into his corner. Reigns tags in. Orton manages to break
free and tag Batista.

Reigns puts Batista out. Ambrose
tags in but flies into a Batista Spinebuster. Tag to HHH. Ambrose put
into the corner but kicks at HHH and tags Reigns…the two glare at one
another and then finally lock up. HHH into the ropes and he gets a
shoulderblock from Reigns. HHH gets up. Reigns hits a body drop off a
run. Tag to Ambrose. Ambrose headbutts HHH and stomps him. Ambrose tags
Rollins who splashes HHH and hits three straight suplexes. Tag to
Ambrose who puts his foot on HHH’s face and hits a rolling splash in the
corner. Two count. Ambrose goes to the top rope but HHH kicks him in
the face on the way down. Tag to Batista who tosses Ambrose into the
barrier, stomping away. HHH and Batista double team Ambrose with the
ref’s back turned even though it’s supposed to be no-DQ. Tag to Orton.
Ambrose fights him off and tosses him into the ropes but can’t hit the
body drop. Orton tosses Ambrose to the mat by his hair.

Tag
to HHH who drops some knees to Ambrose. HHH tries to whip Ambrose into
the corner but Ambrose reverses and HHH gets sent into the buckle and
out of the ring. Ambrose crawls to his corner but HHH stops him. HHH
hits the Kneelift but Ambrose bounces off the ropes and hits a
clothesline. Hot tag to Reigns who takes out Orton and beats on Batista
in the corner, then a HUGE running clothesline. Rollins comes in and
takes out Orton who leaps on the mat. HHH gets in and Reigns body drops
him, then kicks Batista in the head. Superman Punch by Reigns but HHH
makes the save. Pier 6 Brawl again which breaks up. HHH tosses Rollins
into the barrier. Orton tosses Ambrose into the ring post. HHH tosses
Rollins into the crowd and they fight there. Ambrose and Orton fight
into the crowd as well. Rollins fights off HHH and then leaps at him off
the barrier. HHH clocks him with something and Ambrose is down. COLE:
“What was that?” KING: “I dunno…something metal.”

Reigns
and Batista fight outside now. Reigns put Batista’s head into the post.
Reigns starts stripping the table. Orton attacks and then he’s joined
by Triple H. They strip down the rest of the Spanish Announce Table.
They set Reigns up for the Triple Powerbomb and put him right through
the table. Evolution rest for a second and assess the damage they just
did. Refs tend to Reigns. Evolution goes back to Reigns and mock him
with the Shield fists. Ambrose comes out of nowhere and takes out all
three guys! Rollins follows up and does the same to HHH and Orton. It’s
just a brawl now. HHH tosses Ambrose into the ramp barrier as the fight
goes up the ramp. Evolution grabs chairs and clocks Ambrose and Rollins.
HHH powerbombs Ambrose on a chair, then hits a Pedigree on Rollins on
top of another one. Evolution heads back to the ring and surrounds
Reigns, who realizes how fucked he is.

Reigns runs at
Batista who hits a Spinebuster. Orton stomps at Reigns. Batista goes
outside as HHH and Orton strip Reigns of his top. Batista brings the
ring steps inside. Orton gets a Kendo Stick or two. HHH rams Reigns’
head into the steps. Orton absolutely whacks Reigns across the back with
the stick. Batista does the same. The two take turns. HHH gets a stick
and joins in. Reigns struggles to his feet with giant welts on his back.
Reigns knocks Orton out with the Superman Punch. HHH immediately
attacks and then gets a chair, clubbing Reigns with it. They beat up
Reigns because Ambrose and Reigns are apparently MIA. Ambrose finally
interferes and he gets swarmed by Evolution. Orton hits him with the
off-rope DDT, using one of the lighting rigs. Evolution grabs Reigns and
gets a chair…AND ROLLINS LEAPS OFF THE JUMBOTRON AND SPLASHES
EVERYONE.

Rollins drags himself back into the ring.
Batista is with him and charges. Batista gets kicked in the face.
Rollins goes to the second buckle and leaps…BATISTA CATCHES HIM AND
HITS THE SPINEBUSTER! Batista goes for the Batista Bomb, Rollins fights
out of it…AND REIGNS HITS THE SPEAR! Cover by Rollins and Batista is
gone!

1st Eliminated: Batista of Evolution

Orton
gets into the ring and hits Rollins with the RKO! Reigns saves it!
Orton sets up the DDT…but Ambrose nails him with a chair! Dirty Deeds
and a pinfall! Orton’s gone!

2nd Eliminated: Orton of Evolution

HHH
is into the ring and sets up for Dirty Deeds but HHH hits a low blow.
He sets up for the Pedigree but Reigns hits the Superman Punch on HHH!
BATISTA GETS INTO THE RING AND HITS A SPEAR ON REIGNS! Holy shit. Orton,
meanwhile, goes under the ring and gets HHH’s sledgehammer. HHH gets to
his feet but Ambrose is there. He rushes but HHH knocks him out with
it. HHH turns to Reigns and tells him to get up. HHH goes to clock him
but Rollins nails him off the ropes out of nowhere! Reigns with a Spear
and The Shield wins it all at 31:03.

3rd Eliminated: Triple H of Evolution

WINNERS: The Shield
GRADE:
B+. A liiiiitle too much Shield peril as the match just dragged on for
no reason other to make this “epic”. The beginning and middle got sloppy
before things came to an end. The “elimination” gimmick, paired with
No-DQ kinda made things a little messy.

Post-match, Reigns and the boys get up. Reigns stands on HHH’s chest as they join fists.

OVERALL: B+. The throwaway matches lowered the grade. Still, I liked this one. 

That’s
it. AndyPG will start
your week off right with the RAW write-up tomorrow night. I’ll be back on Tuesday with Main Event, Scott Keith will get you the NXT report and Tommy will take you into the weekend with the Smackdown Review.


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you to all my readers and if you wanna read more of my stuff, please
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